SHE Magazine – September 2016

XBIZ™ is the adult industry's leading publisher of business news and information, providing up-to-the-minute coverage of the industry at XBIZ.com and in three trade publications — XBIZ World for the digital media market, XBIZ Premiere for the retail market and Sexual Health Magazine for the intimate products market. In addition, XBIZ hosts five annual trade events including the industry's top awards show of the year, the XBIZ Awards. XBIZ is frequently cited in the media for coverage of the industry and has been published in CNN, Fox News, Newsweek, MSNBC, Forbes, The Wall Street Journal, Wired, CNET, ABC, USA Today and Los Angeles Times among others.

00:00


		of 136

2 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B ER 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 3

SHE September 2016 8 What Women 24 Picking the 44 Sex & 70 Pink for Want to please her in the bedroom? Emily Morse tells you how. Alicia Sinclair shares tips for shopping for pleasure products. K’hara McKinney reveals the social lessons that sex can teach us. Inspire collection of female- centric items benefits breast cancer organization. Want 12 Mindful Sex 28 Dr. Ava Cadell tells you can improve your sex life by changing your thinking. 16 Embracing Dr. Jessica O’Reilly offers seven tips for amazing oral sex. 36 Ashley Manta shares personal experience of overcoming negative thinking. SHE MAGAZINE Job Well Done Bottoms Up Abundance 4 Right Toy // Dr. Hernando Chaves addresses concerns over anal play. S E P T E M B E R 2016 Socializing 50 Perfecting the Position Kait Scalisi offers four tips for making the most out of doggy style. 64 45 Years of Pleasure The Pleasure Chest recalls milestones of past four decades. Pleasure 72 Hit Me Baby Lynda Mort of BDSM company XR Brands discusses basics of impact play. 74 Just the Tip No topic is off limits when Emily Morse answers sex questions from fans. Subscriptions SexualHealthMag.com subscriptions@shemediateam.com Advertising business@shemediateam.com Connect with Us SexualHealthMag.com facebook.com/SexHealthExpo twitter.com/SexHealthExpo SHE MAGAZINE IS PUBLISHED BY ADNET MEDIA AT 5042 WILSHIRE BLVD., #487. LOS ANGELES, CA 90036. TELEPHONE: (310) 820- 0228. FAX: (310) 943-2578. THE ADVERTISER IS SOLELY RESPONSIBLE FOR ADVERTISING CON- TENT, INCLUDING PHOTOS AND/OR ARTWORK, SUBMITTED FOR ADVERTISEMENT AND SHALL INDEMNIFY THE PUBLISHER FROM ANY LEGAL ACTIONS RESULTING FROM STATEMENTS, PHOTOS, OR ARTWORK PRINTED IN THEIR AD DUE TO COPYRIGHT AND TRADEMARK IN- FRINGEMENT, LACK OF PROPER RELEASES, AGE VERIFICATION, IDENTITY AND LIBEL.

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 5

FROM THE EDITOR Welcome to the first issue! Welcome to the first issue of SHE magazine—a groundbreaking sexual health-focused publication dedicated to covering the latest news and information about sex, and exploring today’s progressive views on intimacy. In each issue, we will take a comprehensive look at the evolving realm of sexual wellness with insight from leading experts covering all aspects of the field. From exclusive interviews with today’s thought leaders to the hottest intimacy tips, pleasure product reviews and more, we at SHE magazine are excited to serve as an indispensable resource for all couples and singles, as well as the industry professionals and companies that cater to them. SHE magazine—much like its eponymously named cutting-edge sister event, Sexual Health Expo—is the first to bring them all together to celebrate sexuality out in the open with the mission to promote healthy intimate relationships and change the way society views sex education. So let’s get this sexual health empowerment movement started! In this issue, we take a close look at today’s hottest toys for couples in our “Passion & Play” special feature, where you’ll discover how pleasure products have evolved and changed the way couples have sex. From kinky BDSM items to the latest high-tech gear for long-distance romances, we break down the top products to try with your lover. While there are the tried- and-true classic products such as the old faithful cock ring and the cutting- edge We-Vibe, in this issue we query sexperts to get their recommendations on the latest and greatest items to add to your collection. Our inaugural issue of SHE magazine is also, of course, packed with practical advice and how-to’s penned by top sexperts that have dedicated their life to promoting sexual wellness. In this issue you’ll find tips on what to look for when shopping for intimacy products, as well as learn about the sexual benefits of exercise. You’ll also explore the deeper side of sex, with insight on mindful practices and the social lessons that sex can teach us, along with several other op-eds that are sure to pique your interest. This issue of SHE magazine also includes a show guide for the second annual edition of SHE New York. Be sure you don’t miss a second of the show, which never fails to educate and entertain. We’ll see many of you there and look forward to becoming your one-stop-shop for timely sexual wellness information. Ariana Rodriguez Editor-in-Chief ariana@shemediateam.com The Columnists Emily Morse Alicia Sinclair Hernando Chaves K’Hara McKinney Kait Scalisi Ava Cadell Dr. Jessica O’Reilly Melisa Fritchle Dr. TaMara Griffin Reid Mihalko Ashley Manta Natalie Feingood Lisa Hochberger Patti Britton 6 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 7

What Women Want The 5 Types of Sex That She Craves the Most By Emily Morse W e’ve all heard the saying: “Sex is like pizza. Even when it’s bad, it’s still pretty good.” While clever—and certainly true of pizza—it’s safe to assume this adage was first uttered by a man. After all, with 85 percent reportedly reaching orgasm during sexual encounters, it makes sense men would have such an optimistic view of sex. Whether it’s Chicago- style, Brooklyn-style or Doggy style—if women are serving it, men are probably enjoying it. While satisfaction is guaranteed for most men, just remember that your taste buds aren’t the only ones in the bedroom. You’ve got another person to please, and pushing her buttons isn’t as easy as ordering your favorite slice. The fact is women have a more discerning palate when it comes to sex and you’ll find that each woman differs in what really gets her juices flowing. Luckily, there are certain things the majority of women crave in the bedroom. We want to feel desired. We want to feel appreciated. And most of all, we want to feel like our pleasure is a priority. So while you’re serving up your greatest hits on a day- to-day basis, chances are, her needs often go unmet. If you know that you’re going to enjoy what goes on in the bedroom regardless, why not mix in a few moves that cater to her refined sexual tastes? Here are five types of sex that are sure to satisfy her carnal cravings… 8 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B ER 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 9

her pleasure. Shut off your cell phones; turn off the TV, and anything else that will distract you from reaching new levels of intimacy with your lady. Remember that foreplay is the bread and butter when engaging in a night of sensual sex. So take your time, go slowly, and explore all of the erogenous zones on her body that so often go neglected in the bedroom. Be passionate, engaged, and don’t be afraid to tease her a little—trust me, she’ll love it. • Oral Sex • Spontaneous Sex door—right next to that “Do Not Disturb” sign. Remember, women love to feel sexually wanted and desired by their partners— and nothing says desire like spur-of-the-moment sex on the living room stairs. Unplanned, spontaneous love-making increases the lust factor by showing your partner that your attraction for her trumps everything else. Turn her on by telling her you need to have her right there and then, no matter the time or the place. And depending where you decide to drop trou and get busy, the possibility of getting caught can also bring added excitement. In fact, a study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine reported that having sex in a public is one of the top fantasies among women—we fantasize about it even more than men do. • • Hotel Sex What’s not to love about hotel sex? There’s the thrill of anonymity, the hint of luxury, and the novelty of doing the deed in an unfamiliar location. Whether you’re booking a weekend getaway, or grabbing a quick room for some afternoon delight, the change of scenery makes even the most vanilla sex feel like a special occasion. The fresh sheets, room service and having someone else to clean up after you speaks to our need to feel appreciated and pampered. Plus, when you’re doing it in the privacy of a hotel room, you can leave all the stress of your home, your pets, and your kids at the 10 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E MB E R 2016 Rough Sex Men are raised to never lay a hand on a woman, which is a good rule overall… Unless the one thing she really wants is for you to play rough in bed. Most women, every now and then, want to be sexually dominated by their partner. It appeals (once again) to our need to be sexually desired—so desired he can’t help but ravish us (with our permission, of course). Engaging in a little power play can be a fun and exhilarating way to explore kink in the bedroom. First and foremost, make sure she wants to play rough, and outline boundaries to ensure that you both feel safe. Then, pull a little hair, do a little spanking, and even bust out the blindfold and handcuffs if you’re feeling adventurous. Revel in the pure lust this type of sex is driven by, indulge in animalistic passion, and go ahead... get a little loud. • Sensual Sex This is the type of sex that most men already assume women want. Candles, a relaxing bubble bath, full body massage, jazz saxophone playing mood music in the background—it’s the stuff of a Danielle Steele novel. Start by clearing both your schedules, set a sexy environment, and let her know you’ve got all night to focus on If sex is like pizza, then oral sex is like ice cream—super satisfying when it’s right, but a wet, disappointing mess when served poorly. And believe it or not, according to recent studies, men are still not going down on their partners as much as women would like. Even if you are one of those wonderful guys that goes down on a regular basis, how do you know you’re doing it right? Are you using it as just a warm-up for intercourse, or are you really taking your time to be the best you can be down under? Pick a position that’s comfortable for both of you and set up camp—rushing this process is one of the biggest mistakes that men make in bed. Take your time to give attention to all of her sensitive areas surrounding the clitoris (just because it’s the star of the show doesn’t mean you should tackle it in the first 30 seconds.) When you finally do make contact with the clitoris, go slowly, build anticipation and pay attention to how she responds. Experiment with different pressure, patterns, and don’t be afraid to use your hands to amplify her experience. Oral sex is all about investing time and effort into just one thing: your partner’s pleasure. Show her you appreciate her and care about her orgasm just as much as your own. Every once in awhile, it’s even nice to make oral sex the only thing on the bedroom menu… So next time you’re feeling frisky and getting ready for sex, remember there is a variety of different styles of sex that will not only satisfy you, but will also appeal to what she wants. So, go forth and show her that you know exactly how to turn her on, pique her pleasure, and keep her coming back for more. Dr. Emily Morse is a sex and relationship expert and host of the top downloaded podcast Sex with Emily. She has helped millions of struggling couples achieve the sex and relationships they desired in order to maintain happiness and longevity. Emily was voted the No. 1 dating and sex expert by DatingAdvice.com and the No. 1 dating and sex expert to follow on Twitter, and has proven to be the go-to for all things sex and relationships.

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 11

g The Magic of Mindful Sex Change Your Thinking, Improve Your Sex Life By Dr. Ava Cadell reat sex starts between the ears, not between the legs. In all my years as a sex counselor, I’ve heard every excuse not to have sex—low libido, premature ejaculation, lack of lubrication, erectile dysfunction, painful intercourse—and I can tell you that (almost) all roads lead to the brain, and the chemical cocktails, or lack thereof, that are triggered by our imaginations. I always recommend my clients rule out medical conditions first, but nine times out of 10, it’s psychological. So how can we 12 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E MB E R 2016 change our brains to become sexier? We can be more mindful, and literally create new thoughts and patterns, forging neural pathways and growing new brain cells to help kick out old habits and usher in new juicy ones. It’s so powerful that you can even think yourself to orgasm! One client of mine was so self-conscious about her body, that she couldn’t let herself enjoy sex with her husband. They both wanted to make love passionately, but her brain was on overdrive sending out nega- tive body image messages, telling her that her post-baby body was ugly. I suggested that she blindfold her husband next time they had sex, to give her the freedom to move around however she pleased without worrying about how she looked. Lo and behold, this transformed her behavior, as her mind was able to focus on passion. She confessed that it was the first time she experienced an orgasm with her husband inside her. Another couple’s sex life was suffering because the man couldn’t get an erection. He went for medical tests on my suggestion, but everything came back normal. Then during one session as the two of them were holding hands and talking about how they wanted to make sex a priority, I noticed that his wife was only describing things that were wrong in their lives. I asked her point

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 13

blank if her husband still turned her on, to which she said, “Of course!” and promptly launched into all the many things that she loved about him mentally, physically and sexually. He was clearly astonished to hear all these compliments, and this was a huge turning point for the two of them. Their sex life was miraculously healed. He had felt emasculated and needed to hear that she still desired him in order for him to become aroused. His brain was starved for attention. As human beings, we crave that release of dopamine we get from sexual satisfaction, and there are many ways to trigger it. For example, the simple act of masturbation stimulates 80 different regions of the brain, producing endorphins that make you feel good. It’s a gift you can give yourself that also improves your sexual health, whether you’re single or attached. Mindfulness is a hot topic for good rea- son. Life gets better when we pay attention to our thoughts and direct our lives to flow the way we want them to. This is certainly true for our sex lives, which many people assume are supposed to just “happen.” The next time you’re wondering why 14 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E MB E R 2016 your autopilot love life isn’t raising your sex drive, try being 100 percent present for your partner, focusing on his or her pleasure. Certain areas of the brain have more touch receptors than others, with the lips, hands, feet and genitals taking up the largest brain space dedicated to sensation. Using this information, you can see why holding hands, kissing, caressing and massaging are very stimulating, emotion- ally and sexually. This also creates magical memories and can refashion the scaffold- ing of your brain to support a healthier and happier sex life. So if in doubt, give your partner a mas- sage with a happy ending! And hopefully they’ll want to reciprocate. Love guru, media therapist, author, and world wide speaker, Dr. Ava Cadell is an accomplished author of seven books. Dr. Ava has appeared on numerous national shows including "Good Morning America," "Extra," "Montel," "Geraldo," "Anderson Cooper" and networks, including CNN, MSNBC, NBC, ABC, Fox News, MTV, VH1, Discovery, Lifetime, TLC, E! and A&E. 10 Steps to Mindful Masturbation 1 Take a moment to shift all of your attention from the outside world to the inside of your body and feel your body relaxing as your mind gets into a juicy state. Make sure you are in a comfortable and safe place where you can relax. 2 Close your eyes and empty your mind of worries. 3 Breathe deeply and slowly. 4 Explore your body with your hands and fingers. 5 Add some lube for a silkier sensation. 6 Release sounds of pleasure. 7 Let your fantasies run wild. 8 Focus your touch on a primary erogenous zone. 9 Use a sex toy for more direct stimulation. 10 Let yourself go and surrender your mind and body to orgasm.

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 15

Embracing Abundance I in Sex, Love & Life The Negative Effects of Negative Thinking By Ashley Manta used to live solidly in scarcity mentality. Romantically, sexually and professionally. I told myself that being fat, a survivor, herpes+ and openly sexual was enough to preclude me from most people’s romantic or sexual interest. That’s why all of my (previous) partners cheated on me, I rationalized. There must be something wrong with me. I’m not enough. Simultaneously, I’m too much. I’m not ____ enough (thin enough, pretty enough, financially solvent enough) but I’m also too much (too sexual, too awkward, too needy, too broken). I regularly settled for whoever would “deal with” me because I was convinced if I lost that person I would never find anyone else who could handle me. I stayed way too long with abusive partners, rationalized cheating (who could blame them? I’m clearly too much for one person to handle), and watched, defeated, as my shaky self esteem crashed and burned on a regular basis. I felt the same way professionally. It tied in strongly with impostor syndrome. Who would pay/hire ME when there were so many other people out there who were so much 16 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E MB E R 2016 better? Who was I to ask colleges or organizations to pay me for my time and expertise? Could I ever expect to be able to make a career out of doing something so unconventional? Somewhere along the line, those notions started to shift. The professional shift was actually the easier of the two. Finding the sex educator, talking about impostor syndrome and hearing from other folks who experience it (hint: it’s all of us), and understanding that a hundred sex educators could teach the exact same material and attendees would still get something different from each person because we all bring our own unique style, background and approach to teaching and relating with our students. I started passing on gigs that either didn’t feel like a good fit or that I knew someone else could do better than I could—but this time it wasn’t because I didn’t think I was good enough. I was actively choosing which opportunities I wanted in my life and that felt good. It felt incredible to say, “actually that’s not a great fit for me, but I recommend X, Y and Z.” The best part? There were always more opportunities in the pipeline. Once I let go of the concept of “I have to say yes to

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 17

18 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 19

20 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 21

everything because what if it’s the last thing to come along for a while,” I feel like I gave permission to do the things that felt most authentically me. That’s how I shifted from talking about being a survivor as my primary topic to talking about sex and cannabis. Romantically/sexually, it’s been harder. It’s challenging to let go of feelings of not enough/too much. I struggled with need. Needing people to see me. Needing people to need me. Only if I was needed could I hope to keep them in my life. I had to be the best girlfriend, the best lover, the best ____ or I would be easily discarded and forgotten. It was anxiety producing. I lived in a perpetual state of fear that I would mess up and they would leave. Or that they would see me, the real me, the flawed me that I tried so hard to keep hidden, and leave. Non-monogamy has helped tremendously with that. And honestly? I’ve only started to hone my non-monogamy skills in the past year. Two years ago, I had my first real polyamorous relationship experience and all of my fear and insecurity came to a head. My partner and I fought. I cried. I broke down. I got really good at makeup because I had to hide my puffy eyes at work. They broke up. I discovered that being a Highlander (there can be only one) didn’t actually improve our relationship. If anything, having a non- monogamous relationship was helping. Getting different needs met by different people (focusing on those who could best meet the needs rather than expecting one person to meet all of them) was hugely helpful for our relationship. For my part, I kicked my ethical sluthood into high gear, but this time with intention. I cultivated healthy, fulfilling sexual experiences with people who valued me. Who didn’t just see me as a placeholder until something better came along. Who 22 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 were utterly un-phased by my herpes status. Who saw me as more than just an assortment of talented orifices. I started to see myself through their eyes. And I started to notice that the more I said “no” to people that weren’t a good fit for whatever reason, the more space I had to say “yes” to those who were. I relied more heavily on my intuition and my gut to determine whom I wanted to allow into my life/heart/body. I also became less stingy with affection. I used to be so petrified that my love was too much to handle that I choked it off so that I didn’t scare people away. Now I’m starting to love more freely. (Monique Darling has been a huge inspiration for this). The healing journey is not linear, but it does seem to be purposeful. Even the lows have value. I’m more confident now than I’ve been in my entire life. I look in the mirror and smile. I take selfies. I believe people when they compliment me. More importantly though, I am starting to see that I even when I’m not on my A game, I still have value. I am still worthy of love. I am enough. So in whatever ways feel safe to you, practice letting go of scarcity and embracing abundance. I’ve found that it has enriched my life in countless ways, and helped to create space for opportunities that I would never have imagined in my wildest dreams. Facilitator. Feminist. Sexuality educator. Ashley Manta’s extensive resume includes work as a liaison between crime victims and district attorneys, reproductive health center assistant, phone sex operator, e-commerce manager for a pleasure products retailer, and founder of CannaSexual, a lifestyle education brand providing information about sex and cannabis.

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 23

Sex Toy Shopping Check List Ladies and Gentlemen, Here’s How to Shop for Pleasure Products By Alicia Sinclair Choosing a pleasure-enhancing product can seem daunting. There are so many choices! You might be tempted to pick a pleasure product purely based on looks, but if you want to love and enjoy your purchase, you must consider so much more. 24 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 R Type of Stimulation The human body has many pleasure zones, so when you’re hunting for a vibrator it’s important to establish what you want to stimulate. If this is your first exploration into the world of pleasure enhancing products and you’re unsure of what you want to stimulate, a safe bet is a product that stimulates your clitoris. The clitoris has more than 8,000 nerve endings and is the only part of the human body (male or female) that is purely for pleasure. In fact, more than 70 percent of women need clitoral stimulation to experience an orgasm. R Shapes Sex toys come in different shapes and sizes to stimulate different body parts. The most sensitive pleasure zones are located on the outside of the body, such as the frenulum, clitoris and the first couple inches inside the vagina. Many women use vibrators and do not include penetration play at all. There are fewer internal nerve endings to stimulate inside the vagina.

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 25

R Materials—Always Choose Body Safe! Pleasure products touch the most intimate parts of your body. You always want to choose one that is safe for your body. Search for products that are made of silicone, hard plastic (ABS Plastic), glass, or stainless steel. Make sure to buy a product that has the words “Body-Safe” and/or “Phthalate- Free” in the description. Phthalates are a chemical used to soften plastics and are often found in low- quality pleasure products; and have been linked to cancer and are banned in the production of baby bottles and children’s toys. R Waterproof R Strength The strength of pleasure enhancing products ranges from soft pulsations, deep and rumbling, or fast and powerful—to pick out the perfect vibe, it’s a good idea to know your sensitivity level. Do you like soft or strong stimulation? Look for a pleasure product that has multiple levels of intensity. This gives you the ability to experiment and chose between light to strong stimulation. R Type of Battery/Power Source How your product is powered directly relates to the strength and usage time, so take this into account as you’re picking a product. Disposable battery-operated products are the least 26 SHE MAGAZINE expensive, however they last the shortest amount of time and are generally weaker in power when compared to their counterparts. Rechargeable battery-operated products command a higher price point, but they are significantly stronger, last longer, and you can feel extra pleasure from keeping batteries out of landfills! The only downside is that they must be recharged. Plug-in, corded products are the strongest of devices. They tend to be lower in price and there is no need to replace disposable batteries or recharge them. However, don’t forget that the cord limits your mobility! // S E P T E M B E R 2016 If you like the idea of using your product in the bath or shower (or bath time is your only alone time), look for a product that is “water submersible.” Note that there is a difference between waterproof products and toys that are water-submersible. “Waterproof” means splash-proof for play and cleaning. Water- submersible means the toy can be used under running water and/ or underneath the water without being damaged. R Travel Lock Would you like to travel with your pleasure- enhancing friend? Prevent any embarrassing buzzing accidents by buying a product that has a travel lock. R Warranty It’s smart to search for products that offer a warranty. Most reputable manufacturers of pleasure products issue a minimum one-year warranty to cover manufacturer defects. R Compatible Lubricant The type of lubricant you use plays an important role in the life span of your products. Different types of lubricant are compatible to the material of the pleasure product. Water-based lubricant is safe for any type of product. Never use silicone lubricant with a silicone pleasure product as this may ruin your product. Alicia Sinclair is the founder and managing director of b-Vibe, a premium, certified body-safe collection of healthy anal sex products. Sinclair is a certified sex expert with more than 14 years of experience in the sexual intimacy industry. Through her extensive work in the adult space, she has led many training programs teaching people about being sex positive— an attitude towards human sexuality that regards all consensual adult sexual activities as fundamentally healthy and pleasurable, and encourages sexual pleasure and experimentation.

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 27

7 Tips For The Best Blowjob Ever A break down of the basic moves for mind-blowing oral by Dr. Jessica O’Reilly Stimulate his B-spot When it comes to penises, it’s often what on the inside that counts. The inner bulb (B-spot) of the penis can be one of the most reactive parts of the body, but often does not receive the at- tention it deserves. Its hypersensitivity may be related to the fact that it includes extensions of the corpora cavernosa, which fill with blood during erection, and the crura of the penis, which are ho- mologous to the sensitive clitoral legs. The sensitive corpus spon- giosum, which surrounds the urethra and forms the very sensitive head of the penis also extends into this area and is covered by the bulbospongiosus muscle. To stimulate the B-spot, press against his perineum just behind the balls. Try using three fingers with firm pressure to press, stroke or glide in short, firm strokes in rhthym with some enthusias- tic sucking action along his shaft. 28 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 Interlace your fingers and use two hands This is the hand-job to end all blowjobs. It’s that good! Slather two hands in lube (twice as much as you’re normally inclined to use) and wrap both hands around the shaft with your fingers interlaced. Stroke from base to tip with lots of pressure (you can use a tighter grip if you use a generous amount of lube) and a little extra squeeze at the very bottom of the shaft. Try this one on its own when your mouth and jaw need a break, or use it as an extension of your lips while sucking to create a warm, tight tunnel of suction. Use Lube! You already know that lube takes sex to a whole new level, but adding a few drops to your oral routine will change the way you

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 29

look at—and more importantly, experience—blow jobs. I use a tiny bit of Astroglide Natural on my upper lip when performing The Tight Squeeze (see below) and my clients use lube on their fingers to “lick” the shaft (wet fingers can feel just like tongues) and weave the fan- tasy of several tongues swirling and sliding around simultaneously. Pulse During orgasm, the brain and body undergo a powerful eruption of activity punctuated by pleasurable contractions in the pelvic region. These contractions are often experienced as pulsing sensations as a result of smooth muscle contraction in the testes, seminal vesicles and prostate. To encourage and intensify these or- gasmic contractions, try squeezing your lips or fingers at the base of the penis in a pulsing sensation with each stroke. Alternatively, you can pulse a few fingers against the B-spot with firm pressure as his arousal levels peak. Try the Twist and Shout technique This is a simple move that combines stroking, sucking, twirling and flicking: Start with your lips two-thirds of the way down the shaft and suck upwards ensuring that the head is very wet. When you reach the coronal ridge, squeeze with your lips and twirl them one-third of the way around. As you squeeze and twist, flick your tongue against the sensitive frenulum (on the underside when the shaft meets the head. Keep this motion fluid, rhythmic and very wet. Try the Tight Tunnel technique If your partner’s penis likes a lot of pressure and in- tense suction, use your teeth (padded by your wet lips and tongue) to clamp the penis tightly as you suck. Use your tongue to cover your lower teeth and wrap your upper lip around your upper teeth (you’ll need lube for this!) so that you can squeeze the penis in be- tween. Suck and squeeze to your heart’s content. This one takes a little practice, but it’s worth it. Try it on your finger: Stick your tongue out just enough to cover your lower teeth; Place one finger on your tongue; Put a few drops of lube on your upper lip; Roll you upper lip around your upper teeth and clamp down as you slide up and down your finger. The Game-Changer technique If you find that your mouth, lips, tongue or jaw tire during a blowjob and it hinders your endurance or pleasure, this is the move for you: suck with enthusiasm as you normally would, but use your thumb and index finger to pinch your lips around the penis so that your face can relax and your fingers do all the work to create a tight grip. Your mouth remains in full contact with the penis the whole time, but your fingers do all the work as they pinch your lips together from the outside. Dr. Jessica O’Reilly holds a Ph.D. in human sexuality with a focus on education. She travels the world to facilitate sold-out relationship retreats from Istanbul to Los Angeles, working with high-power couples to transform their relationships from good to great. 30 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 31

Rethinking Intercourse Why It’s Time to Rethink Intercourse as the Gold Standard By Natalie Finegood Goldberg, LMFT, CST W hat I’m proposing is a little different than what most people might expect a sex therapist to say, but I’m going to say it anyway: Intercourse isn’t that important. Or at least, it doesn’t have to be (unless you’re trying to get pregnant, and even then… there are alternatives). Why do I say this? Because as a sex therapist, clients come to see me when they feel like their sexual parts aren’t working. Upon further exploration, though, we often come to find that they are working, they’re just not working in the manner that their owner thinks they should be. What do I mean by this? I’m coming to soon. I’m not coming soon enough. My partner can’t enter me. Intercourse hurts. The majority of the sexual concerns clients present with revolve around not being able to execute what they consider to be “successful intercourse.” At what point do we start to ask ourselves: What makes these issues a problem? When can we start to accept the natural variations of human sexual functioning, rather than trying to live up to the holiest of grails that is intercourse? Rather than labeling ourselves as the problem, how about we start labeling the expectation of intercourse as the problem? Most people will respond by saying that if something feels problematic to you, then it’s a problem. While I often agree with those sentiments, particularly as a therapist, I also believe that my job involves sex education. And lots of it. A lot of the sexual concerns mentioned above are only concerns if we’re talking about trying to have intercourse. There is so much a person can do sexually when their penis isn’t erect, their vagina isn’t lubricating or receptive to insertion, or their body just isn’t responding in the way its owner wants it to. In these cases, the difficulties with intercourse can leave people feeling like they are a failure; ashamed and broken. Why not intercourse? Let me be clear that I have nothing against intercourse. My concern lies mainly with the amount of distress that’s created by using intercourse as the litmus test for the quality of one’s sex life. By holding to the measure of intercourse, so many people find themselves not measuring up, and as a result, feeling intense shame, sexually inadequate, and frustrated. The endless sexual possibilities that could be are overlooked and undervalued when we put all of the attention on intercourse. Why put yourself through such agony? With a change in perspective, you can go from a dismal sex life to a robust one in no time at all! 32 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 33

So if intercourse isn’t the main focus of sex, what is? One of the first interventions I use when working with clients who are struggling with their sex life is to help them take the focus off of intercourse and put it on to sexuality, pleasure, and eroticism. Because of the goal-oriented nature of intercourse (erection/ lubrication/orgasm/ejaculation), pleasure and enjoyment are often lost if those “goals” aren’t being met. And when goals aren’t met, we’re way more likely to feel disappointment than pleasure. Here’s where it gets tricky: Pleasure is different for everyone. So while I do recommend shifting the focus off of intercourse, it’s up to you to decide what to shift the focus on to. What feels pleasurable to you? When was the last time you had a junior-high style heavy petting and make out session? When was the last time your partner explored your body or vice versa? Just for the sake of exploration? Used a feather? Used a vibrator or toy on you? Or even just touched you lightly all over? When was the last time you teased your partner? Tied them up with a scarf? Or tried role playing? With an endless combination of body parts, there are a multitude of things that can be rubbed together for the purposes of sexual pleasure (erotic dice anyone?). If you struggle to get your penis to do what you want it to (be erect at a certain time, ejaculate, or not, at a certain time, etc.), try shifting your focus from trying to have intercourse to trying to experience pleasure. What feels good for you? How can you please your partner? How can you touch them and interact with them sexually in a manner that feels good to them? That feels good to you? What other body parts, toys, or props can you utilize? If you struggle with pain during intercourse or lack of lubrication, never underestimate the fun that can be had from outercourse! The majority of women require external clitoral stimulation anyway to orgasm (not that it’s all about the orgasm either), so again, rub, fondle, and play at will! Don’t forget the intense pleasure that can be had from other erogenous zones like the nipples, breasts, ears, and neck ( just to name a few)! Some of my favorite outercourse recommendations include partner No. 1 laying down on their stomach, and partner No. 2 using lube, rubbing his penis between partner number one’s butt cheeks (not inserting themselves—think more like a hot dog in the bun). Alternatively, this can also be done between a woman’s vaginal lips (again, lube recommended for ultimate pleasure). I urge you to ask yourself when the last time you were sexual with your partner—without having intercourse? If it’s been a while, give it a try. Try fooling around like you’re in middle school. Try setting up an erotic scene. Try pleasuring each other orally or manually and leaving it at that. Try taking intercourse off the table, and see what other sexual fun can be had. Don’t let intercourse limit your sexuality! Natalie Finegood Goldberg, LMFT, CST is an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (MFC #53017) specializing in sex therapy and psychotherapy. Working with individuals, couples, and groups out of her private practice in Beverly Hills, Natalie’s passion is to help clients who struggle with sexual dysfunctions including erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, vaginismus, pain during intercourse, and low sexual desire. Natalie’s motto is: “The broader your definition of sex is, the more sex you can be having!” 34 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 35

I Bottoms Up Anal Sex Gets a Bad Rap—So Why Is Everyone Doing It? Dr. Hernando Chaves t’s no secret that anal sex practices are more visible today and on the rise. From major magazines and motion pictures to more backdoor sex with partners, we’re getting more comfortable with bringing anal into the conversation. How can we avoid an area that crosses our paths almost every time we’re between the sheets? Should I touch it, tickle it, lick it, penetrate it, or steer clear of it? There’s a mixed emotions and feelings with how people perceive anal play. For our purposes, lets define anal sex as any type of sex play with the anus, rectum, and/or prostate. This may include, but not limited to, penetration, fingering, licking, and massage of the anus and rectum. So let’s take a look at this traditionally forbidden and taboo area and learn a bit 36 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E MB E R 2016 about our bodies’ pleasure capacity. How often do people have anal sex? One thing is certain, the numbers are rising and it’s becoming a more popular sexual practice among people in the U.S. In 2005, The Center for Disease Control (CDC) survey found that 40 percent of males and 35 percent of females ages 24-44 engaged in heterosexual anal sex. In 2010, the Kinsey Institute’s National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior (NSSHB) study found approximately 40 percent of males ages 18-59 have engaged in insertive anal intercourse in their lifetime and about 20 percent of males ages 25-49 engaged in the behavior in the past year. The NSSHB also found that an estimated 40 percent of women ages 20-49 and 30 percent of women ages 50-69 have engaged in receptive anal

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 37

intercourse in their lifetimes and approximately 20 percent of women 20-39 reported engaging in the behavior in the past year. The fact is, if you’re not practicing anal sex, you probably know a few people that do. Is Anal Dirty? There’s no denying it, anal sex crosses paths with areas that come in contact with feces. I can’t argue that. But why is that so threatening? Every person crosses paths with feces on nearly a daily basis. Most people glance when they wipe, sneak a peak before they flush, and so on. Those readers who’ve changed a baby’s diaper know you can’t be squeamish. Many people fear the embarrassment of excremental leftovers, but this can be easily remedied with a high fiber diet, eating light on play days, and a little prep work beforehand. Whether it’s anal play or something else in life, it’s often best to face your fears and challenge your anxieties to overcome them. Any rectum can be cleansed beforehand with a water enema (rinse and repeat, like your shampoo), which can effectively reduce the possibility of any embarrassing accidents. Make sure to do this a few hours before to give your rectum a chance to absorb the remaining water. Many enemas with solutions and laxative agents can erode the lining of the rectum and are not recommended. For external play, some simple washing with soap and water or an antibacterial wipe can cleanse our anus in preparation for some external anus play. What About My Orientation? What about it? Orientation isn’t defined solely by our behaviors, it’s much more complex. Anal sex is a sexual behavior and orientation is who and what we’re aroused and attracted to. Some people who identify as straight engage in anal play, others who identify as gay may not play with the backdoor. Some straight guys enjoy anal play on themselves while others choose not to. In my opinion, a straight guy who likes receiving anal play from a female doesn’t make him gay, it makes him open-minded. Medical Issues? Remember than old myth that anal sex leads to leakage, or anal incontinence? That didn’t hold up as the American Journal of Gastroenterology found no difference in levels of anal incontinence among men who engaged in receptive anal sex versus men who didn’t. One study found an increase in flatulence (passing gas) as a result of receptive anal penetration. However, simple Kegel exercises and anal sphincter squeezing exercises can help tighten things up and keep your sphincter muscle strong. With millions of people having receptive anal sex, wouldn’t we have a mass hysteria of leaky butts if this were true? Is it Painful? Anal sex has long been associated with pain. Without adequate preparation and technique, it can be excruciatingly painful for the receptive partner. Any sexologist will tell you, anal sex doesn’t have to be painful and can be comfortable. A rectum doesn’t lubricate like a vagina. It needs lubrication to facilitate comfortable penetration. I cringe when someone suggests saliva; so pick up a bottle of something slippery and condom-safe (water- based, silicon-based, or a hybrid). I recommend silicone as it doesn’t absorb as quickly in the rectum like water-based lubes. Anal penetration needs a lot of TLC to prepare the anus; both the body and mind. A big part of anal penetration and reducing pain is calming and overcoming the psychological anxiety of anal, including relaxation training, deep breathing exercises, and muscle relaxation. A great tip for initial entry is to sync insertion with exhales, which relaxes the sphincter. Deep breathing, mindfulness and relaxation exercises can be very helpful in calming the internal sphincter to facilitate initial entry. For those seeking to explore the anal region safely and pleasurably, here are three amazing books to read to continue your exploration: Tristan Taormino’s “Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women,” Jack Morin’s “Anal Pleasure and Health,” and Charlie Glickman and Aislinn Emirzian’s “The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure.” For the visual learners out there, try anal instructional videos for men and women by Tristan Taormino, Dr. Ava Cadell, and jessica drake. And remember, take things slow, learn before your try, and make anal fun, consensual and enjoyable. Dr. Hernando Chaves is a clinical sexologist, loveologist and psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, Calif. Dr. Chaves works as a sex coach, offering guidance and technique training to becoming a better, more skilled lover. As a sex educator and public speaker with national and international experience, Dr. Chaves encourages the pursuit of sexual knowledge and healthy sexual expression. 38 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 39

The Stages of Sex How to Enjoy Sex From Start to Finish By Melisa Fritchle Phase One When people think of “having sex” they tend to focus Creating Space on the hot and heavy, rubbing bodies against one to be Sexual another part of it. But really, there are many aspects life to Ú to have carve In sex. real out Certainly time we have in this a schedule actually of a sexual encounter, most of them overlooked and was easier to do in that six-hour break underappreciated. In real life we don’t fast forward to between classes when you were in the climax, nor should we. We miss out on a lot if we do. We need college, but don’t be discouraged. I said it before to rethink the sexual encounter, giving it a new starting point and a it have again—scheduling and sex I will can say be very hot, if you engage your mind new finish that can really encompass the greater possibility. in anticipation and enthusiasm. Because creating space to be sexual is about more than timing. It includes day dreaming about things you want to do, exciting yourself, grooming yourself with the intention to seduce, and possibly preparing for a sexy experience by purchasing a toy or even putting clean sheets on the bed. There are lots of ways to create space. What is important is to honor that you have a part to play in this, sex doesn’t just happen. TRY IT Think of something erotic to you. Take time to visualize or imagine the emotions or sensations you might feel. Enjoy a brief fantasy break. Phase Two Becoming an Embodied Self, Again Ú Maybe some of you enlightened folks go around all day long, aware of your body and mindful of each fluctuating sensation. But most of us have to consciously bring our attention to our body. We have to let the rest of the day go, so that we can be present to pleasure. Finding ways to refocus and stop thinking about the rude thing your boss did or the thing you forgot when you went to the store today and have to remember tomorrow, is key. If you skip this step, you are may feel a nagging disappointment, like you are missing something, because you are—the actual experience of sex. Getting into your body, into a

body-mind that is awake to the senses and the intuitive movement that is yours, is an important part of a sexual encounter. not. But mostly this phase includes being able to feel and respond, not planning ahead but being willing to ride the waves as they come. TRY IT Close your eyes and TRY IT Consider your own take a deep breath. Lick your lips slowly. Really feel your tongue on your lips, the warmth or coolness there, the tension or movement of your mouth. Take another deep breath, feel the rise and fall of it. Stay with your body for a moment; how does it feel? Phase Three Engaging With Another Ú Sex with a partner requires that we enter into a dance, both leading and following. We must listen to the cues of another body as well as our own. We may choose to open ourselves up in ways that are vulnerable or risky. This is a distinctly different way of being than the way we spend most of our day. Some people find they need some time to verbally connect and others need to use silence to shift gears from the conversations about responsibilities and chores. Engaging with the other person starts with initiation of sex, which could have started days before with some hot texts or a whisper close to one’s ear. It is an act of seduction, drawing the other person in as you allow yourself to be drawn in, a willingness to enter a trance of one another, your attention right here with them, now. TRY IT Think about a new way you can show someone you desire to connect with them. Think of something you can say and something you can physically do. Maybe you want to go do it right now? Phase Four Riding the Waves Ú Ok, this is the part that most people think of when they think of having sex. This is the part when the mind can go still while the body gets very, very busy. And this is action, of pushing and clutching and reaching new heights of sensation. Here is where we may feel out of control or overwhelmed or exhilarated. We may feel deep emotions or a welcome emptiness, cleared out, simply sensation. This may include orgasm or orgasms or ability to let go and be in the moment. Do you let yourself go there? Or are there ways you hold back? What distracts you or keeps you in your head? Phase Five Returning Ú And then things settle down, we return to our minds, our rooms, our awareness of the rest of the world. But for a period of time there is a need to transition. For some this involves a heavy sleepiness, a rest after intensity. For some, a desire to keep closeness and body contact and to allow emotional ripples to play out gently. For some, it may be processing what just happened, building connection through sharing with words and questions and possibly insights. For some, a withdrawal into self, to reaffirm the boundaries of our being. But we all take some time to return, to close that particular sexual encounter in some way. This phase is just as important as the others and can be just as rich and satisfying. TRY IT Ask yourself—what do you need after a sexual experience? Have you shared this with a partner? I invite you to honor all of these phases and to take responsibility for them. Your sexual encounters are vaster than you have been led to believe from the way we talk about “sex.” Redefine your start to finish and you will find there is so much more to explore. Melisa Fritchle, LMFT, is the author of “The Conscious Sexual Self Workbook.” She is a holistic psychotherapist, sex therapist and award-winning educator with a private practice in Santa Cruz, Calif. An engaging speaker, she travels within the US.. and internationally to inspire and inform people about sex, relationship, and holistic psychology. Her writing can be found in Psyched in SF, PBS: This Emotional Life, Sexology International, and her ongoing Conscious Sexual Self blog. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 41

Let’s Get Physical 7 Benefits of Exercise on Your Sexuality by Lisa B. Hochberger N eed motivation to work out? What if I said exercise would not only improve your relationship with yourself, but with your partner as well. There are a number of health benefits associated with exercise but the sexual benefits are the most rewarding of them all. Whether you are having sex with a partner, or providing yourself with a little self-love, understanding how exercise enhances your experience of sexuality is essential. First and foremost, it is important to understand what sexuality is. Why? Because it is a significant piece of the human experience and plays a pivotal role in shaping a person’s life. Sexuality influences how we enjoy the world through our five senses. Contrary to popular belief, it isn’t just about sexual intercourse. Sexuality includes our thoughts, feelings and behaviors associated with gender, being at- tractive, being in love as well as being in a relationship. Relationships 42 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EMB E R 2016 may involve sexual intimacy as well as sensual and sexual activity. So how will exercise increase your sexuality? By heightening your sensuality. Sensuality is all about your mind-set. It’s not just about how you perceive your body to look, it is also about what you know your body is physically capable of doing. It’s important to have sex with your senses and exercise will help make this possible.

important sex organ, not your genitals. If your brain isn’t feeling positive about the way you look, it won’t allow you to experience shameless pleasure. Work out to get your “fix” of body positivity. 3 Exercise will keep your blood flow moving and your sex life circulating. It is important that your blood is pumping to all areas of your body so you can feel extra “tingly” inside. If you are using genitals to have sex, increased circulation will allow for genitals to become erect with more ease. Steady blood flow also increases lubrication that can make sex more pleasurable by improving genital sensation. 4 enhances arousal 1 manifests mindfulness Exercise will give you positive energy centered on your sense of self. When you engage in physical activity, your body produces a "natural drug" called endorphins. Endorphins are addictive because they induce euphoria. This biologically produced chemical has the power to take away pain by increasing pleasurable feelings. Endorphins clear your mind of mental clutter and help relieve your body from stress. When you free your mind from the weight of the world, you are able to focus on yourself. To enjoy maximum pleasure during sexual experiences, it is important for you to feel embodied and connected with yourself (and possibly another). To have sex with your senses you must be able to be present with your pleasure. 2 improves body image Being confident in your body isn’t about your weight, shape or size, it is about how you feel within yourself. The more proud of your body you feel, the more ready you will feel to experience sexual pleasure with another person. Despite what you may think, the center of sensuality and attraction takes place in the brain. Your brain is the most sparks your libido When you exercise, your testosterone levels spike because you are building muscle mass. Testosterone is the main sex hormone in men, but is also produced in smaller amounts in women. It is this hormone that has been said to influence the amount of sex that men and women desire. Upping your level of testosterone can help you increase your want and need to enjoy pleasurable sexual experiences. 5 intensifies attraction Exercise allows you to be able to see yourself in a new light while making yourself more receptive to others. It is important that you take the confidence that has been established through your daily workouts so that you can apply it to your relationship with yourself (and your partner). Use your eyes and your mind to see your changing body. Your eyes are the windows to your soul. Exercise helps you use your mind to experience feeling attractive and being attracted to others through all of your senses. 6 improves flexibility Sometimes all you need is a little bit of change to make something feel new and exciting. Exercise will promote a healthy, fun and exciting sex life by providing you with the flexibility to try new positions. I am not suggesting you try anything you are not comfortable with, but by being flexible you will give your sex life a lot more opportunities for stimulating pleasure. 7 greater opportunity to orgasm Beyond flexibility, being physically fit enhances your ability to have orgasms. The more strength and endurance you have, the more prepared you will be for sex itself. Sex can be a very intense physical activity that requires you to engage in extended periods of “cardio” to have an orgasm. Exercise will increase your sensuality and reinforce your sexuality. It is important to remember that body achieves what the mind believes. Lisa is cofounder of Sexpertise, an informative portal that educates the public about sexual wellness using innovative technology. Formally trained in human sexuality, Lisa’s passion for the field is rooted in her belief that all human beings should understand what healthy sex is, regardless of culture, body or ability. Her particular areas of expertise are: the intersection of media and sexuality, modern romance, the effects of body image on sexuality, sexuality for people of all abilities, social media’s effect on sexuality and contemporary dating websites. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 43

Social Lessons That Sex Can Teach Us F By K’Hara McKinney or many years, sexuality has been considered taboo in our society. We have been taught that sex is just for procreation or recreation, but have not been encouraged to fully embrace all of the benefits that can come along with engaging in sexual activities. Studies have increasingly shown the multitude of benefits that come from sex, including the positive impact on our physical health and wellness that such activity provides. But sex can also be a teacher to us. Being that sex is a social activity, we learn our predominant social lessons through sexually engaging with others as we are in our most vulnerable state at this time. Here are a few lessons that sex can teach about how to socialize with others. Communication Once we master the conversations around sex, other conversations about a variety of other things begin to transform. The phrase “it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it” comes into 44 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EMB E R 2016 play and finding ways to finesse the conversation in such a way that passions are explored and sexual needs are met, is a gift and art form. Boundaries Through our sexuality, we learn how to say “yes” or “no: and how to identify people that are safe to allow into our intimate space. More than that, we master safe places and safe conversations around sexuality. Sex is our first understanding of how to be firm or gentle and how best to advocate for our needs by asserting our limits and boundaries. is able to successfully orgasm is what makes intimate encounters beautiful and worthwhile. Through sex lessons, we learn how to negotiate encounters with others even outside of the bedroom. Finding healthy ways to explore our passions with another person, to communicate and to advocate for our needs are lessons that go beyond the simple act of sex. Safely developing and practicing these lessons with others can make us better people in every aspect of our lives. Who knew sex could be so advantageous? Give and take Typically a contributing factor to reaching climax is the feeling that the other person wants to make sure that we are satisfied before finishing the job. The double-edged sword of this is that too much focus on the other person does not allow for self-pleasure and enjoyment. Navigating between engaging in the positions that are enjoyable to each party and doing what it takes to makes sure that each person K’Hara McKinney is a licensed marriage and family therapist who has been practicing in the Los Angeles for more than 10 years. With an emphasis on sexual disorders, sexual trauma and extensive work with couples, she aims to continue to provide insight, education and support to encourage more fulfilled and loving relationships with self and others.

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 45

Pleasure Power 8 Tips to Stay Sexually Empowered This Year Dr. TaMara Griffin W ith all the crazy media messages about sexuality that bombard women on a daily basis, it can be confusing to determine what it really means to be sexually empowered. When we buy into the negative message that society imposed on women, we somehow lose our way trying to fit into these stereotypic images of sexuality that subdue our self- esteem and confidence. Well the great news is that you don’t have stay bogged down by these messages and images, you can reclaim your sexual self today! Check out the sexually empowering tips below. 46 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EMB E R 2016 Become intimately acquainted with your body In order to experience pleasure, you have to be intimately acquainted with your body. Understanding your reproductive system, sexual response cycle and how your body changes during each cycle is the hallmark of sexual pleasure. Learning about what feels good to you can increase your chance of experiencing sexual pleasure with sex partners because it enables you to communicate your sexual turn-ons to your partners. Our bodies are a temple. We only get one, and since there’s no refund or exchange policy on our body, we have to treat it with the utmost respect. If we don’t take care of it, who will? Embrace your sexuality You must be comfortable with who you are as a sexual being and that begins by first loving yourself, understanding that your are a sexual being, and giving yourself permission to discover, explore and unleash your sexuality. You cannot truly share your sexuality if you are not comfortable with who you are. You cannot negotiate safer sex

nor can you talk to your physician about your sexual health. Honor your sexuality by creating an empowering sex-positive mantra. Make it a priority to look in the mirror each day and repeat the mantra. This will help you to reaffirm your sexuality on a daily basis. Let your no mean no way you move. It’s confidence. It’s passion. It’s intelligence! It’s owning who you are and so much more. Push pass society’s shallow definition of sex and create your own brand. Often times we set our relationships up for failure because we don’t to talk to our partners—we just “expect” them to know what pleases us. Don’t expect your lover to be a mind reader! You have to communicate with each other about what turns you on and off because what worked with one partner may or may not necessarily do it for the current partner. Be very specific about what you need. Rather than criticizing your lover about the things that you don’t like, instead tell them what feels good and that you want more of it. Part of being sexually empowered means making a decision and sticking to it. If you are not ready for a relationship or ready to have sex. Don’t settle! Stay true to your real desires. If you give in to your hormones just for the sake of an orgasm, you will end up regretting it later on down the line. Learn to identify your triggers so that you can put a plan in place to avoid those pitfalls. Take time to get to know your partner What is the rush? Sex, especially casual sex, does not come without a cost. As difficult as it may be to ask your partner about his or her sexual past, it is essential. At the end of the day, if you cannot ask your partner these questions then maybe you should not be having sex with them. Love yourself enough to not put yourself at risk Practice safer sex Learn how to negotiate safer sex. Talk about condoms, dental dams and lubes! Eroticize safer sex by turning it into a game that both of you will enjoy. Above all, know your value and worth, respect yourself and your body and be very cautious about whom you share yourself with. Don’t allow love or your hormones to get the best of you. Take time to protect yourself. You are responsible for your sexual health. Keep it sexy even when no one is looking When we look good, we feel good and are more likely to exude confidence. However, being sexy is so much more than physical. Being sexy is also an attitude. Sexy is at the core of character. It lies in the unique ability that we as women can express ourselves. Sexy is the Communicate with your sexual desires Give yourself permission to experience pleasure Growing up, many of us were taught that sex was something “bad,” “wrong,” or “sinful.” It’s time to let go of all that negative baggage you’ve been carrying around for years and give yourself permission to enjoy sex! After all, we were created as sexual beings. In fact, women have the only organ in the human body that is solely designed for pleasure so why shouldn’t we enjoy it? It’s time to unpack your sexual baggage and give yourself permission to discover, explore and unleash your sexual self! Dr. TaMara is a clinical sexologist, sex therapist, best-selling author and speaker with more than 20 years of experience speaking, writing and teaching about sexuality. She travels the country helping individuals embrace and honor their sexuality. Dr. TaMara has published numerous books and articles. She is the owner of 7 to LIFE by Dr. TaMara. Dr TaMara is also the editor-in-chief or Our Sexuality! Magazine. Dr. TaMara is also the host of her own radio show, “The Dr. TaMara Show.” Visit DrTaMaraGriffin. com for more information. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 47

3 Intimacy Can Go Stale in Any Long-Term Relationship— Here’s How to Fix It By Dr. Patti Britton I n my career of over 30 years as We live in a world where sex is everywhere: it’s used to sell every- thing from shampoo to coffee and you’ll find sex tips in every mag- azine on newsstands. But according to statistics, 15-20 percent of marriages are sexless, and I personally believe it to be much higher based on the frustrated couples that come to my practice. Think this only happens to other couples? Even if your relationship started out hot and steamy, your daily responsibilities can take a toll. Your job may get busier— 48 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EMB E R 2016 Tips for Reviving Your Sex Life a sex coach in my private practice, there’s not a lot that I haven’t seen and worked with. The most common problem that clients come to me for? Living in a sexless relationship. sometimes you’ve been working all day and then you have to go home to look after the kids. Maybe you have to look after aging parents, or you are working two jobs to bring in more money. Your life has gotten too busy, and getting hot under the covers has slipped down your list of priorities. Does that sound like you? It’s been a long time since you and your honey have gotten busy and something has to change. Here are three things you can do to revive your sex life:

1 2 Find out what you like and ask for it When your life gets too hectic, you forget to spend time just connecting with each other with touch. A shoul- der rub, a cuddle, holding hands, they all get pushed to the side to do the laundry or try and meet that important deadline at work. Fix this by scheduling some time—it can be 10 minutes or an hour, where you are just touching with no pressure for it to lead to sex. Give a sensual massage, caress, tickle, take a bubble bath together or take a walk holding hands. Sensual touch with no expecta- tions can actually stoke the fires and lead to sexual touch, which can then lead to greater intimacy. Make time for touch Do you know your biggest turn-ons, and turn-offs? If you don’t, now is the time to find out. Take time to find out what fires you up, and what is a big “No!” Turn- ons can be a foot massage, kissing the neck or reading some steamy erotica. (Check out my book: The Adventures of Her in France, which is an erotic story for women). Maybe you like seeing your woman in some sexy new lingerie or doing a slow dance together. Remember, what turns you on is unique to you, so find your own personal turn-on recipe. Find out where your personal hotspots are on your body too. Is your neck super sensitive? Your breasts? Backs of your knees? Your feet? Then all you need to do is ask for more attention to be given there. Do you like a clitoral stroke to the left or right? Is oral sex how you get off? Discover whatever works and ask for it. For turn offs, maybe you don’t like it when your partner doesn’t wash, when they’re rubbing you too hard or they’re just rushing too fast. It’s really important to speak up when something isn’t working for you, but make sure you say it to your partner with no blaming, complaining or accusing. That just isn’t sexy and can kill the mood in an instant. Here’s a great phrase to use, “Honey, I’m not so turned on when you ... but I love it when ... please do it again...it drives me wild!” 3 Take some “me” time In your busy life when you’re just too damn tired for sex, if you want to be hot and ready for your honey, it’s re- ally important that you take time for yourself to recharge your batteries. “Me” time, is the way to charge up your batteries because if you’re running on empty, your batteries are not full for “we” time. For women it can be things like having a mani-pedi, lunch with your bestie, going to yoga class or curling up with a good book. For guys it can be joining that local baseball team, going for a beer with the guys once in awhile, or even going on a hike. Sadly, a dry sex life in a couple can be a symptom of something wrong in the relationship. This is when you need to call in the ex- perts, and see either a relationship counselor or a certified sex coach to work through it. A great place to find a certified sex coach who has excellent credentials is through the World Association of Sex Coaches (worldassociationofsexcoaches.org). If you personally feel called to work with sex professionally, go to my training program, Sex Coach U, where you too can become a certified sex coach and clinical sexologist. Head to SexCoachU.com and sign up to the newsletter to keep up to date with all the latest news from our students and alumni in more than 45 countries around the world. Here’s to your hot and steamy sex life! Dr. Patti Britton is a clinical sexologist, sexuality educator and the pioneer of sex coaching. As a well-respected world leader in the field of sexology, she is the author of hundreds of articles, four books, and is former columnist for Penthouse Forum. Her media record includes appearances on national television shows, documentaries, live talk and news radio, and with frequent quotes in magazines, such as Cosmopolitan, Men’s Health, Women’s Health, Glamour, Men’s Fitness, WebMD, AOL Health. Dr. Patti is the co-found- er of SexCoachU, the world’s premier credentialing and training institute for sex coaching. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 49

Perfecting the Position M 4 Tips for Hot Doggy Style Sex By Kait Scalisi ost advice about sex positions has you doing some sort of acrobatics— you know, balancing on one leg, or your head, or having your sweetie lift you up. And let’s be real—for a lot of people this isn’t fun or even possible (though if you love it, get on with your bad self ). There’s an easier way to increase your pleasure in the bedroom by simply making small tweaks to classic sex positions like doggy style. Doggy style is the position I recommend the most. Why? There’s so many ways to change it up so that it feels amazing for you and your partner. 50 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 Doggy style generally means you’re on all fours and your partner enters you from behind. I prefer to classify any rear entry position as doggy style. This means you can be standing, kneeling, laying on your stomach, or anywhere in between. You can use pillows to prop yourself up—I recommend the Liberator Jaz Motion Sex Pillow since it’s extra supportive and has a machine-washable cover. You can also lay on a table or desk, press against a wall…the list goes on and on. The point is, there’s a way to customize doggy style sex to feel effin’ fabulous for you and your lover. Whether you’ve done it doggy style a million times or are looking to try it for the first time, here are four tips to make doggy style sexier.

Use shorter thrusts Over and over again I’ve been told that doggy style kind of hurts. That’s because it allows for deeper penetration than other sex positions. Your partner may actually be hitting your cervix and if you aren’t fully turned on, this usually doesn’t feel good. For most women “fully aroused” means 20-30 minutes of foreplay. And it’s more than being wet (which you might not be): you’re wanting too. If you’ve extended your foreplay time, added lube, and still find doggy style uncomfortable, ask your partner to use shorter thrusts. Not only will this prevent them from hitting your cervix but it also focuses the thrusting on your G-spot. Stimulate your clitoris I swear to all higher beings, this one tip will change your life. Seriously, if you ignore everything else I’ve written, don’t ignore this. Even if you love G-spot stimulation, the clitoris is your pleasure center. Four thousand nerve ending with no other purpose than feeling good. So grab your favorite vibe or use your fingers and go to town. Shake that ass Moving your hips will take doggy style to a whole new level. Play around with what feels good: moving side-to-side, in small circles, up and down (yes I just told you to twerk…don’t be hatin’), or back to meet your honey’s thrusts. You’ll know you’ve found what works for you when you’re oh-so-surprised by new feel-good spots. Also- combining this with clitoral stimulation may just turn you into a pile of jelly. You’re welcome. Play with the booty So while your butt is up and out, it might as well get some attention, right? Spanking is certainly possible. Groping and massaging are great too. You might also enjoy some external anal stimulation (I recommend the MINNA LIMON for this…just don’t forget to wash it thoroughly before using it on your clit again) or even penetration with fingers, anal beads, butt plugs, or any of many size dildos. There are as many different ways to do doggy style as there are people to do it. Finding the way that works for you, your body and your partner lets you have the hottest, most fulfilling and most pleasurable doggy style sex. Kait Scalisi is a sex and relationship coach who teaches fresh ideas and how to ask for what you want so you can have the fulfilling, intimate and adventurous sex life you desire. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 51

Safer Sex 7 Easy Steps to Having ‘The Talk’ by Reid Mihalko D SHE MAGAZINE o you want to up your chances of having great sex? Do you want to show your partners that you care about their sexual health? Do you want an easy way to show folks that you “have your shit together” that also alerts you to when someone you’re considering sleeping with doesn’t have their shit together (so you can avoid potential drama and frustration)? 52 // S E P T E M B E R 2016 Mastering these seven easy steps to having a safer sex conversation will up your self-confidence, lessen potential relationship drama, and improve your love life and health. Let’s start with three things I know as a sex educator who’s had over 50,000 people attend my workshops and programs: 1. Most people have never been taught how to have a safer sex conversation. 2. Most people (maybe not you, but certainly a friend, lover, partner or potential partner) were raised in households and cultures were we weren’t encouraged to talk openly about sex or our desires. 3. When it comes to “The Sex,” almost everyone’s terrified of saying the wrong thing and ruining “the moment.” What does it all mean? When it comes to getting it on, most folks are stuck in seventh-grade school dance “Hell,” and wait for the other person to initiate the safer sex conversation, a.k.a. “Have the Talk.” Which means: No one is having the safer sex conversation in bed (or before). Not having a safer sex conversation only contributes to anxiety levels and uncertainty, reinforces shame, and encourages silencing our desires. These dynamics allow fear to fester in unpleasant ways… Unrealistic expectations and feelings of inadequacies can run amok, making it hard for people to relax enough to feel pleasure and actually enjoy the sex they’re having. And, if by some miracle, you are enjoying something or excited by the possibilities of intimacy, then miscommunication (because nothing was actually communicated!) can turn into mishap, emotional drama and regret. Want to shift all that? Let my “7-Step Safer Sex Elevator Speech” deliver you to better sex, and make yourself and your lovers feel safer. The reason I call it an “elevator speech” is because, after a little bit of practice, you can “pitch” the entire conversation in three to four minutes, almost like the elevator pitches they talk about in business skills classes. The only difference is your business is pleasure. Pssst… These steps can also help you avoid a ton of heartache and pain, too!

Share Your Results Something I Like When were you last tested for STDs, what did you get tested for, and what was the status of those tests? One or two things that you know you like sexually (or might want to do with this person). Share Other Important Sexy Time Info What is your current relationship status and sexual orientation, and what, if any, relationship agreements do you have that the other person should know about? What pronouns do you use? Any dirty talk words they should use/not use? Any potential triggers you might have or safewords they should know about? Share Your Safer Sex Protocols & Needs What are your safer sex protocols? What are your emotional needs? Your physical needs? What about aftercare/after-sex needs? Optional Update Quick rundown of any risky sexual things you’ve done since you were last tested. Did a condom break recently? Recently forgot to take your birth control? At least one thing you know you don’t like sexually (or that you aren’t up for today). Last Step “And How About You?”: Then ask the other person, “And how about you?” and listen to what they say and how they say it… Imagine the amount of relief and empowerment you’ll create for yourself by checking-off the “Have the Talk” box whenever the need arises. And the reason you want to end your talk by asking the other person, “And how about you?” is because you’ve just offered them a gift: You role modeled for them that it’s okay to talk openly and honestly about sex, and you just offered them an easy template and an invitation to share with you. If, by the way, having this conversation sends the other person running for the hills, and actually ruins the chance of you having sex, it’s my strong belief (and professional opinion) that you probably saved yourself a ton of relationship headache. Remember, someone not being able to That’s it. Seven simple steps that once you practice them in the mirror a few times (or with a friend), will only get easier to have. It’s okay to be nervous or not get it “perfect” when you do it “for reals,” but being able to have this conversation can alleviate so much uncertainty and anxiety. Please tweak this conversation to fit the lifestyle and love-style that makes you happiest, and please get tested regularly. The only way to get this conversation wrong is to not have one. America's favorite sex geek, Reid Mihalko of ReidAboutSex.com and Relationship10x.com helps adults and college students create more self-esteem, self-confidence and greater health in their relationships and sex lives using an inspiring mixture of humor, keen insight, and comprehensive sexual health information. Something I Don’t Like have an adult conversation about sexual health and basic wants in bed is an excellent sign that you shouldn’t sleep with that person! You want to scare the wrong people away so that you can attract the right people. Date your species, I say! And your Safer Sex Elevator Speech is a great vetting tool. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 53

Passion & Play With So Many Innovative Toys, Couples Sex Is Better Than Ever By Colleen Godin 54 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 55

A s the evolution of the vibrator marches on, sex toys and kink objects have also lost all those silly taboos (and seriously, it was about time!). A bedside drawer full of toys and kinky accessories is the sign of a healthy, happy and positive person who prioritizes pleasure. We’re pretty sure that when said happy person meets their sexual match, their partner is going to be thrilled to catch a glimpse of the bed- room fun that lies ahead. When we hear “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours,” we’re going to assume you’re referring to that kick-ass collection of sexy toys. As the evolution of the vibrator marches on, sex toys and kink objects have also lost all those silly taboos (and seriously, it was about time!). A bedside drawer full of toys and kinky accessories is the sign of a healthy, happy and positive person who prioritizes pleasure. We’re pretty sure that when said happy person meets their sexual match, their partner is going to be thrilled to catch a glimpse of the bedroom fun that lies ahead. When we hear “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours,” we’re going to assume you’re referring to that kick-ass collection of sexy toys. Coupled & Kinky The best parts of being in a sexual twosome (or threesome, or foursome) are all the amazing ways to connect and explore using vibrators, cuffs, whips, clamps, dildos and whatever else you can fit into your proverbial bag of tricks. The folks at Sportsheets have a serious understanding of the importance of keeping the sparks flying. Founder Tom Stewart and his sister/business-partner-in- crime Julie have been dedicated to “Keeping Couples Connect- ed” since opening the doors of their kink accessory company. “We want people to be connected, not just physically, but emotionally,” says President Julie Stewart. Tom and Julie have knocked it out of the park with all kinds of wild, unique products for wherever you like to get it on. Just look at the 1 SEX IN THE SHOWER line (and yes, there is actually an entire line of fun for shower play). Waterproof, suction-cupped cuffs, handles and foot rests come to the rescue to make this awe- some-but-slippery location your new favorite place to get kinky. If you really want some world-record-breaking sex, get your hands on Sportsheets’s flagship product — 3 THE SPORTSHEET. “It’s a specially designed bed sheet that comes with four Sports Cuffs and Velcro anchor pads,” explains founder Tom. “Couples can experiment with new positions and a little bondage, and cre- ate that sense of excitement that might be missing.” We love The Sportsheets’ official slogan: “You’re only as tied up as you want to be.” The Velcro pads keep you snugly secured, but only if you’re digging the action. If this is your first bondage rodeo and things get a little intense, the large pads can be removed lightning-fast, even if you’re the one wearing the cuffs. LGBTQ Love One of the best outcomes of the pleasure revolution has been the acceptance and love for couples of all sexual identities. Ev- erybody deserves sex and pleasure, and no one understands this better than the LGBTQ community. Just under a decade ago, the choices of toys in this category were at best seriously lacking, and 56 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 at worst downright embarrassing. Enter the creative minds be- hind two of the pleasure industry’s most recognizable niche com- panies: Stephanie Berman of THE SEMENETTE and Steve Callow of Perfect Fit. From their respective corners, these pleasure pio- neers gave fellow gay and lesbian couples better ways to play, and opened the door for all couples to feel comfortable exploring dif- ferent aspects of their sexuality. “When our original product, The Semenette, was invented, its purpose was to provide my wife and I with a more intimate and pleasurable experience while trying to conceive at home,” says The Semenette CEO Stephanie Berman. The company’s original product consisted of a dildo equipped with a hollow tube and small, squeezable bulb, allowing users to “ejaculate” with their liquid of choice. In Berman’s case, that choice was the sperm used to conceive with her partner. “My product was definitely a game-changer for us,” says Berman. “Not only did it provide the function we needed, but it allowed me, as the non-carrying part- ner, to feel emotionally and physically involved in the conception process.” Stephanie’s latest innovation is an updated take on her initial invention: the POP DILDO, which combines the function of The Semenette with the design and style of luxury toy company Fun Factory. Even if baby-making isn’t your end goal, imagine the fun of getting to choose a tasty lubricant to squeeze out of the POP into your partner’s mouth. Toys for couples, especially with the LGBTQ audience in mind, have often shown one major flaw: only one partner actually feels any pleasure. “So many products are designed with only one of the partners to receive the benefit,” says Perfect Fit CEO Steve Callow. “A classic example would be a penis extender. Usually the receiver is the beneficiary of the product, whereas the person wearing it feels nothing,” notes Callow. “We’ve engineered prod- ucts specifically to address these issues, as we feel both parties should have pleasure from the use of a couples’ product.” Perfect Fit’s products are created and tested by people who understand the complexity of pairing different bodies, gender identities, and preferences. “We invented the TUNNEL PLUG, an anal toy de-

Hump Gear Raw Dawg S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 57

signed for couples use; the HUMP GEAR RAW DAWG, an anal device to make anal sex more relaxing and enjoyable; the JOCK ARMOUR HYBRID CLOTHING/COCK-RING; the FAT BOY LINE OF EXTENDERS, which are the first extenders designed for both people to climax; and the 2 ZORO LINE OF STRAP-ONS, the most comfortable strap-on you’ll ever wear,” says Callow. Regard- less of how or with whom you play, there’s a good chance Steve already has the ideal product on hand. Sex Education for the Next Generation Now that your toy collection is steadily growing, it’s time to get schooled! The more sex toys on the market, the more couples are getting curious about the mechanics of private parts. If you’re looking to hit the books, sex educators are the best bet for a fun, eye-opening education in how our bodies experience pleasure. You don’t have to be an avid bookworm to enjoy Dr. Sadie Alli- son’s collection of sexy literature. Does 4 RIDE ‘EM COWGIRL! SEX POSITION SECRETS FOR BETTER BUCKING sound like a boring read to you? Sadie sounds off on everything sex: tips for toy lovers, position guides for couples, hot oral techniques, and experiments in self-loving. For those still new to the toy-and-lube game, sexpert Sadie can guide you to the best beginner’s products to start filling up your nightstand on her online shop, TICKLEKIT- TY.COM. “Slippery Kitty lubricant is water-based, pH balanced, hypoallergenic and paraben and glycerine-free,” says Dr. Allison. “It’s enriched with antioxidants, moisturizing aloe vera and vita- min E, is latex compatible, and can be used with silicone sex toys.” Sounds like we just found our go-to lube! Still looking for that per- fect, no-frills vibrator? Try the TICKLE KITTY CLASSIC BULLET VIBE. For toy newcomers, this little powerhouse piece will jump- start start your buzzy addiction. Modern sex ed is more than just the birds and the bees. It’s about connecting with your partner and mutual satisfaction. “Be a generous lover,” advises Dr. Sadie. “When you take the time to understand and focus more on your partner’s pleasure, you will quickly find the doorways to sexual fulfillment opening up wide for both of you.” High-Tech Sex Long-distance relationships and business or military travel can be rough on your sex life, but not for long in our tech-centric future. The emergence of teledildonics, a funky niche mixing telecom- munications and sex toys, is changing the way we stay sexually connected across continents. The team at Kiiroo has engineered a couples’ device that puts a whole new spin on cybersex. KIRROO’S PEARL, a touch-sensitive vibrator, AND ONYX, a smart masturbator, allows couples to have digital sex in real time. Connect to your partner using Bluetooth and Kirroo’s video chat platform, which works with most smart devices and operating systems. Stroking or inserting the Pearl vibrator transmits your exact movements to the Onyx masturbator. “When he touches his device, she can feel it in her device and vice versa. The connection is real time,” says Kim Pot, communications manager at Kiiroo. Kiiroo’s his-and-hers products look appropriately like a NASA invention, but we promise you don’t have to be an aeronautical engineer to use them. “Both devices are easy to connect,” says Kim. “You just need a Bluetooth connection and our app or plat- form to feel your partner from anywhere in the world.” If you thought watching something hot with your mate was a turn-on, try it in virtual reality. When your partner returns home, you can even sync up the Pearl and Onyx to match the strokes and thrusts of your favorite porn. We keep hearing that computers are a huge distraction from sex, but we’re pretty sure Kiiroo has found the antidote. Connected for Life We know this sounds obvious, but there’s truly never been a better time to love sex. No matter who you dig, what parts you’ve got, or how you choose to get down, there is a sea of sex toys out there just waiting to deliver the orgasm of a lifetime. Choose a body part to please, pick a partner (or three), and dare yourself not to find at least 10 sex toys that can satisfy your exact needs. The phrase “something for everyone” might be cliché, but it’s a perfect fit for the incredible future of sex toys. Play on, my friends! 1 3 2 58 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 4

KIIROO's Pearl & Onyx S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 59

10 Top 1 2 Hottest New Sex Toys for Couples 3 4 5 PicoBong Remoji Chakrubs Amethyst b-Vibe Rimming Plug Crave Bullet Calling all smart phone addicts (no pun intended)! You’ve officially got the best excuse ever to keep your cell at your side during sex. Remoji by PicoBong takes four classic sex toys—the bullet vibe, the couples’ penis ring, the anal vibe, and the masturbator for him—and turns them into a app-tastic way to get off. Grab your toy of choice, connect it via Bluetooth with the Remoji app, and get buzzin’ as the vibrations sync up with colorful games and music. Think of it as Candy Crush with a way better reward for scoring points! Try it solo, and then pair up with your partner (because we know you’re both in bed on your phones anyway). See who can beat their top score before the vibes send you over the edge! When you’re in tune with your body and your partner, sex can be a healing experience. Whether you’re in need of some sexual soul- searching or looking for a different kind of toy experience, Chakrubs offers a line-up of gorgeous and sensually simple pleasure products. Ditch the batteries and learn to connect with the vibrations of pure crystal. These smooth wands are made of stunning stones, such as our favorite, the powerfully purple Amethyst. Light some candles and incense, and treat yourself or your partner to a sexually spiritual awakening. Prostate massagers and T-shaped vibes are great for getting warmed up for anal sex, but most basic anal toys lack the necessary gusto to bring you to the finish line without a lot of extra help. The b-Vibe combines the smooth, classic shape of the butt plug with the vibrating delights of a prostate or G-spot massager, along with an unexpected twist. The thin neck of the plug that makes contact with the entrance to your booty has rows of spinning beads. Read: this plug vibrates and gives you a rim job. If anal sex is always on the menu during play time, this a toy you cannot pass up. We love the company’s all-inclusive stance on ass enjoyment. Whether you’ve got a P-spot or a G-spot, the b-Vibe Rimming Plug is the anal toy for you—as long as you’ve got a butt! Remember those adorably tiny yet powerfully strong bullets you could snap up for a couple bucks at the local sex shop? Crave has taken your favorite tiny toy and upgraded it to grown-woman standards. Made of stainless steel and finished in gold, silver, or rose gold to match your jewelry collection, this little powerhouse will become your next go-to sex toy. Toss it in your purse, hide it in your lingerie drawer, or stuff it in the pocket of your strap-on. Best of all, Crave has ended the annoyance of accidentally pressing the function button at the worst possible moment. The Bullet’s button is recessed, meaning it curves inward instead of sticking out like a sore thumb (and catching on your thumb during coitus). 60 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EMB E R 2016 Jimmyjane Form 2 (& Intro 2) Boutique vibe company Jimmyjane has dominated the shelves of sex toy shops since the inception of their famous Form 2 dual-motor clitoral stimulator. The side-by- side motors surround the clitoris, allowing for a unique and sublime kind of pleasure. If the Form 2’s price tag is a little hefty after your student loan and car payments are settled, try the newly- introduced version of this JimmyJane favorite. The Intro 2 vibe offers the same double-stimulation design at less than half the price. This version is battery-operated and larger than the original so newcomers can get in on the action. Once you land that dream job, you can always upgrade to the tried-and-true Form 2.

6 JO Gelato Sex toys might be the main course of your evening, but don’t forget about dessert! System JO’s Gelato lubricants turn you or a lucky partner into a delectable after-dinner sweet. These water- based, sugary treats offer all the flavors of your favorite desserts. Mint Chocolate, Tira Misu, and Salted Caramel are some of our top picks to start your tasty bedside collection. Try licking them off your partner’s nipples or add some extra yum to oral sex. You might just be tempted to turn your lover into tonight’s main dish! 7 The Rhythm Collection by Kama Sutra After delivering some of the most scent-sational and enticing massage oils, this luxury lotions- and-potions company just released a brand-new line of gorgeous silicone vibrators. Whether it’s rabbit-style vibes that tickle your fancy or sensual, slim smoothies to reach your G-spot, the Rhythm Collection is the perfect addition to your post-massage sex session. There’s even a bendable vibe with twin motors that doubles as a couples’ toy for you to wear during the main event. Kama Sutra’s toy line provides the kind of luxury and unique options that sex toy connoisseurs crave while keeping it simple enough to entice vibe newbies. If your next toy is a Rhythm piece, consider the bar forever raised on your buzzy bedroom standards. 8 9 10 The Satisfyer Pro 2 Tantus Rumble Oral sex simulators are a staple among men’s sex toys, but let’s face it: this category is seriously lacking for anyone without a penis. Over the past few years, we’ve seen several toy manufacturers try to correct this blank spot in the market—and either fail miserably, or charge half your rent for the retail price. The Satisfyer is our favorite in the clitoral- oral genre. For starters, the price won’t drain the majority of your paycheck. Turn on this small, wand- like device and you’ll receive an amazingly delicious sensation that feels strikingly similar to the real thing. The silicone head suctions nicely to labia of all shapes and sizes. It’s also waterproof, making clean-up a snap. This might be the first sex toy to truly make your oral champ of a partner just the slightest bit jealous, so don’t be shy about handing it over and letting your lover please you with some gentle suction. The Hitachi Magic Wand is famous for a reason: big power, big orgasms! The forward-thinking folks at Tantus took this classic and added some extra awesome features that make this new wand perfect for all bodies. The Tantus Rumble has the power you crave in a wireless, rechargeable version, complete with easier-to-reach power controls, a silicone head, and a tilted handle for a more comfortable grip. Hands getting tired after a marathon sack session? The Rumble comes to the rescue with feather-light design. You can thank us later when this Tantus newcomer earns its’ place at the front of your bedside table drawer. POP! By The Semenette & Fun Factory Regardless of your biological parts, ejaculation is undeniably hot. It feels amazing for the receiver and can be a huge turn-on for your partner. The makers of The Semenette—a hollow dildo that aids female couples in conception using donated sperm— and luxury toy pioneer Fun Factory have teamed up to create POP!. This realistic- yet-modern silicone, wearable dildo comes equipped with a small, hollow tube and hand-held bulb. When you’re ready to “pop,” squeeze the bulb for a fun burst of whatever pushes your buttons— faux sperm, water-based lube, or something flavored and tasty for a new take on oral sex. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 61

Talkback What new sex toy are you excited to incorporate into your intimate play? “The We-Vibe Nova because I love simultaneous clitoral and G-spot stimulation but hate traditional rabbit style vibes. Nova’s flexible clitoral stem enables it to actually stay in contact with the clitoris!” — Alison Barber, retail shop owner and writer, TabooRVA.com “I’m really excited about Godemiche silicone, especially the newly released Ambit dildo. Their designs are beautiful and body-safe.” — Grace Selena, sex toy reviewer, PrincessPreviews.com “I really want to add the Blush Novelties Bianca from the Vilain line to my toy collection. It’s rechargeable for a powerhouse of fun, curved to make me scream ‘holy Grafenberg!,’ and if that weren’t enough it also has ticklers to help me achieve maximum pleasure!” — Hunny S. Thompson, sex toy reviewer “This might sound weird, but I’m loving the designs from Geeky Sex Toys, especially the Jon’s Dildo Sword from Game of Thrones.” — Kara Sutra, writer, KaraSutraReviews.com “I love my Doxy Massager wand and can’t wait to transform my favorite sex toy with a new set of attachments.” — Melissa McFarlane, blogger, Voluptasse.com 62 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EMB E R 2016

Talkback What's your most recommended couples toy? “My go-to sex toy for couples is actually a set from We-Vibe called the Pleasure Mate Collection. It includes the We-Vibe Tango (my favorite rumbly vibrator) as well as two silicone attachments for the Tango: a pink one called the Glow and a grey one called the Dusk. Either could be used for G-spot stimulation but the Dusk with its flanged base can also be used anally, giving the couple a wide range of stimulation options for sexy fun times.” — Ashley Manta, sex educator “I’m a big fan of the Trio by b-Vibe. It’s a slim anal plug, so it’s great for folks who are new to anal play, it’s remote-controlled (perfect for combining with other kinds of sex or going out to dinner), and if a woman wears it during intercourse, her partner will definitely feel the buzz. Plus, it’s rechargeable and made from body-safe silicone. It’s an amazing toy.” — Charlie Glickman, sex & relationship coach “Why look for the new when retro feels so good? My recommendation for an exciting couples product is the original Sportsheet by Sportsheets. Restraint play can reinvigorate sex by adding a naughty, taboo mindset and an intimate bondage experience to massage, foreplay, oral and intercourse. Try the restrained, lying doggie position as pictured and bring sensual dominance and submission back into your bedroom.” — Dr. Hernando Chaves, clinical sexologist “The Inspire Vibrating Tulip Wand is an incredible product for couples. It bends in all sorts of directions, and it’s shaped with a longer end and shorter end that provides for endless possibilities. Couples will find both partners can enjoy enhanced sensation with the vibrations it provides.” — Dr. Mike Dow, sex therapist and CalExotics Expert Sexpert S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 63

Legendary For 45 Years: Pleasure Chest’s Growing Legacy By Sarah Tomchesson T he conventional image of a sex shop conjures up dim lighting, frosted windows and embarrassed customers darting from aisle to aisle. Not so at the Pleasure Chest. Warm, radiant light fills the space, elegant floral arrangements greet your en- try, splashes of red catch your eye and an ener- gized and knowledgeable staff welcomes you in and guides you through your journey. A Pleasure Chest experience is simultaneously disarming and relaxed, a balance that is very carefully crafted. Pleasure Chest stores surprise many who are new to the brand in their conscious embrace of sexuality in all of its forms. Pleasure Chest unapolo- getically incorporates niche products into the mix. You may en- counter a life-sized, black silicone fist in view of introductory plugs 64 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EMB E R 2016 barely the size of a finger—the fist suggestively placed as if to say to onlookers “you may someday be coming back for me.” While the product selection may nudge some customers out of their comfort zone, the Pleasure Chest does not overlook that sex can be silly and playful, scary or new, and deliciously tender. The stores are, most importantly, designed to put people at ease with beautiful displays, wide aisles, plentiful testers and a staff trained and tested to meet every customer where ever they are on their sexual journey. The Pleasure Chest has had decades to perfect the business mod- el and this fall it celebrates 45 years in business. The company’s first location, which opened in a 47” x 12’ long space in the West Village in 1971, challenged convention by refusing to block out the store windows with XXX, which was standard for any store with adult material. Founders Duane Colglazier and Bill Rifkin aimed

Top: Pleasure Chest’s Original location in the West Village, 1971 and Los Angeles location in the 1980s Bottom: The entry room and “kink” room in Pleasure Chest’s Upper Eastside Boutique, 2014 to create a department store feel. “We treat our customers just as though they were walking into Gimbel’s to buy a table and chairs,” said Bill Rifkin in an interview in 1972. This simple principle con- tinues to guide and set the Pleasure Chest apart today, now under the leadership of Duane’s nephew Brian Robinson. “They began by selling waterbeds and quickly came to serve a diverse clientele: from the housewives of Nixon’s moral majority to the gay men of the neighboring West Hollywood. By refusing to block out their windows, they refused to be a secret space for secret desires. They instead embraced a ‘sex positive’ movement.”—Huff- ington Post, 2011. Pleasure Chest’s bold embrace of sexuality, particularly alter- native sexualities, as a healthy part of life has garnered loyal fans along the way such as Joan Jett, who has been quoted saying she bought her leather ringed belt from the Pleasure Chest’s Los An- geles store, and gave it to Sid Vicious. The belt can be seen in many photos of them from the ‘70s. Pleasure Chest even inspired Queen, whose 1978 song “Let Me Entertain You” contains the lyrics: If you wanna see some action We get nothing but the best The S & M attraction We got the Pleasure Chest From the ‘70s on, the Pleasure Chest has been at the center of our culture’s ongoing sexual revolution. Just as “Deep Throat” made its mark on the world of porn, the Pleasure Chest opened its first location. As the celebrations of sexual freedom of the 70s were S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 65

tempered by the brutal reality of the AIDS epidemic in the 80s, Pleasure Chest faced its own heartbreak at losing many of its leaders to the disease. By the ‘90s, Pleasure Chest had become the go-to Hollywood spot for all things fetish, such as when “Pulp Fiction” designers were looking to dress the famous Gimp character and rented the costume from the Pleasure Chest. In the early 2000s when “Sex in the City” took the world by storm, no other store would do for their fa- mous rabbit vibrator episode. Today, mainstream icons such as Gwyneth Paltrow, the Kardashians, Queen Latifah, Victo- ria Beckham and Halle Berry all proudly identify as Pleasure Chest customers. At its founding, Pleasure Chest’s assertion that everyone had the right to pursue sexual fulfillment was radical. Forty-five years later embracing sexuality is practi- cally analogous to embracing a healthy lifestyle, or as Halle Berry herself said, “make regular visits to the Pleasure Chest! You can’t forget your sexuality. You can still embrace your body by going to the gym or [going to] The Pleasure Chest.” For nearly five decades Pleasure Chest has continued to embrace sexuality in all it forms and has positioned inclusivi- ty at the heart of all business decisions—from hiring practices and product selection to community engagement and design. As a result, the shopping experience continues to have ex- tensive appeal. Pleasure Chest’s roots in the gay community have held even while also creating a safe space for straight couples to explore. Both the convenience-minded consum- er, who can enjoy the ease of stocking a friend’s bachelorette party while upgrading their pleasure collection to the newest toy in one stop, and the luxury shopper, who is looking to in- dulge in one-of-a-kind pleasure objects, share a love for the Pleasure Chest. As the Wall Street Journal wrote in 2014 af- ter the opening of Pleasure Chest’s Upper Eastside location: “The chic 6,000-square-foot outpost, now Manhattan’s largest erotic boutique, is titillating a traditionally vanilla neighborhood […] The timing may finally be right to open this Sephora of sex toys a stone’s throw from Bloomingdale’s. Between the boom of ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ and vibrators on sale at Duane Reade and at mall gadget chain Brookstone, sex is selling more than ever. Even those seeking to simply upgrade their pleasure IQ can partake in Pleasure Chest’s free, weekly sex education program, PleasurEd, which also happens to offer the most range of topics of any pleasure-based education program. Since 2008, PleasurEd has offered nearly 1,500 free classes on topics ranging from oral sex tips and tricks to bondage as meditation and queering your sex to more than 30,000 attendees and has trained 60 Pleasure Chest educators. By marrying a vibrant legacy, a mission of inclusivity and an un- matched adaptability to the growing and changing pleasure market, Pleasure Chest has persisted as the oldest sex-posi- tive retailer in the country. With five locations in New York, Los Angeles and Chicago and a new e-commerce platform launching in 2017, Pleasure Chest is not only legendary after 45 years but also still evolving. 66 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EMB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 67

68 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EMB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 69

Pink for Pleasure Inspire Collection of Female-Centric Products Benefits Living Beyond Breast Cancer By Ariana Rodriguez P leasure products manufacturer CalExotics and Living Beyond Breast Cancer (LBBC)—a non-profit organization that benefits breast cancer survivors—have come together to launch Inspire, a new line of female-centric products whose sales benefit the non-profit organization. The collection features nine items that are designed with sexual wellness in mind. Items in the Inspire collection include two Kegel exercisers, two wands, two arousers, a dilator kit, a panty teaser and breast massager. All Inspire products are waterproof and made of premium silicone that is body safe, unscented and phthalate-free. The powered items in Inspire feature 10 functions of vibration and are USB rechargeable. LBBC connects those affected by breast cancer with trusted 70 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 information and a community of support. CalExotics first became a supporter of LBBC’s efforts more than a decade ago with the company’s release of the Papillon massager. As the company’s first full line of products dedicated to a charitable organization, Susan Colvin, founder and CEO of CalExotics and Jean A. Sachs, CEO of LBBC, sat down with SHE magazine to offer further details on the Inspire collection.

What inspired the launch of the Inspire collection? We are a woman-owned company and breast cancer in an important issue to us. Our goal was to bring awareness to Living Beyond Breast Cancer and help support their efforts. We wanted to make a bigger impact and with a full collection of products, we can help do just that. With Inspire we have the opportunity to impact women’s lives and our community. SUSAN COLVIN : How do Inspire’s products promote women’s sexual health? Each product offers unique benefits to women in the form of sexual health and sexual satisfaction. Sexual health is a large component of women’s overall health and is vital for overall well-being. Inspire products are designed to help improve vaginal strength, decrease physical discomfort during intercourse, help strengthen pelvic floor muscles, increase sexual stimulation and frequency of orgasms. COLVIN : How did CalExotics and Living Beyond Breast Cancer establish a partnership? Over 10 years ago, we wanted to create a line of product supporting a worthy cause that helped support women. We found Living Beyond Breast Cancer and instantly knew this company was one we wanted to partner with. Our core values aligned and our mission was the same, supporting women’s health. We were so impressed with the work LBBC was doing and thought it was a unique organization as it supported survivors through their recovery. Our first venture into the partnership was with the Papillon Massager. It’s a small massager that comes in a counter display. CalExotics donated a portion of each product sold to LBBC. I am proud to say this massager is still on the market today. COLVIN : journal Cancer reported that 42 percent of women with breast and gynecologic cancers wanted medical attention for their sexual health needs but only 7 percent asked for advice. How does cancer affect sexual wellness? Various types of breast cancer treatment (chemotherapy, surgery, radiation, hormonal therapy) can affect a woman’s sexual wellness. Many factors can come together to reduce sexual desire, including fatigue, menopausal symptoms, pain during sexual activity, decreased ability to achieve arousal and lubrication and breast cancer itself. SACHS : How will this line benefit cancer survivors and their partners? Data indicates 50 to 90 percent of women who have had breast cancer report concerns about its impact on intimacy, interest in sex and performance. Nearly one-third feel lingering problems for years, and even decades. Breast cancer does not mean an end to a woman’s sexuality. COLVIN : It is our goal that this line brings visibility to LBBC and the unique services they provide, in addition to creating funding for LBBC programs. SACHS : “We wanted to make a bigger impact and with a full collection of products, we can help do just that. With Inspire we have the opportunity to impact women’s lives and our community.” — Susan Colvin, founder and CEO, CalExotics How important is sexual wellness to cancer survivors? Sexual activity after diagnosis and treatment has benefits for the body, mind and soul. A study in the JE AN A. SACHS S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 71

The Basics of Impact Play Finding the Perfect Tools, Pre-Play Warm-up Are Essential for a Satisfying Experience By Lynda Mort, XR Brands When it comes to BDSM impact play implements, one size certainly does not fit all. Different tools can produce a wide variety of effects and selecting the right one is largely dependent on what the recipient wants to feel—and where they want to feel it. That’s why it’s essential to understand the basics of impact play and how each product style and design can suit individual tastes and desires. What’s so appealing about impact play? The reasons for engaging in impact play are highly individual. Some find the sense of power they feel by taking or giving up control makes it incredibly thrilling and others simply love the intimacy it can build. It isn’t uncommon for partners to feel closer and more connected after engaging in a painful BDSM scene, and for some the pain itself is the big draw. Erotic pain raises endorphin levels, often called the body’s “feel good chemicals,” which can create the euphoric feeling of a natural high and increase pain tolerance. Plus, impact on the buttocks specifically can be especially erotic because it engages an area of the body very close to the genitals. It’s important to remember that impact play must be done properly and with the right instruments to produce these positive effects. A smack in the wrong place, at the wrong time, or with the wrong instrument can bring a kinky sex scene to a screeching halt. The goal of any type of impact play session is to slowly raise the receiver’s endorphin levels to put them in a state of bliss—NOT leave them with full-body bruises. (Unless that’s their goal!) Why is warm-up important? It takes about 10 minutes for an endorphin rush to kick in, and that’s why properly warming up the receiver is essential. Though impact play can be done on various parts of the body, it’s most common to find impact tools that cater to one of the most popular areas of the body: the butt. From 72 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 paddles to crops, we have a variety of implements to choose from—but it’s key to start with one that’s best suited for a warm-up session. Our Round Fur Lined Paddle from Strict Leather is an ideal to kick off this type of impact scene, as it provides a firm feeling without providing too hard of a thud against the rump. Begin by striking the behind lightly with the paddle, but be sure not to hit the same spots repeatedly. Vary impact points slightly and switch cheeks every so often, periodically turning the paddle over from the leather side to the fur-lined side, running it gently in a circular motion over the impact areas. The contrast between spanks and tender rubs helps get those endorphins going and simply feels good, and after a few minutes the butt will grow warm to the touch and redden. The 10-minute mark is when the endorphin rush begins to take full effect and the receiver’s pain threshold is elevated. Now’s the time to increase intensity and switch implements. This step isn’t as simple as grabbing a few random toys, however. Here the receiver’s preferences really come into play and the tools you use can make or break the scene. Before ramping up the intensity by switching to more severe toys, it’s important to know what kind of sensation the receiver likes: thuddy or stingy. Though some people enjoy both, many have a strong preference to one sensation over the other. Thuddy toys often cover a wider surface area and tend to be made from heavier, denser material. The sensations they elicit are less on the painful side and feel more like a deep tissue massage. If you punch yourself in the meaty part of your thigh, that’s thuddy. Although it may hurt a bit depending on how hard you strike, the impact can radiate deep within your leg. The Strict Leather Bullhide Flogger, for example, is a great example of a thuddy impact toy. Stingy, on the other hand, is a sharp pain felt on the surface of the skin that feels like a pinch or a paper cut. Material makes a big difference, too; thin, light toys like the 3-Layer Slapper and Short Riding Crop from Strict Leather offer nice “clacking” sound thanks to their leather construction. Impact play tools can also be made of materials like flexible silicone or rubber, or even metal and have quite a bite. The Crimson Tied Afterglow Rubber Flogger, Heavy Duty Silicone Flogger, and Tenderizer Spiked Paddle Slapper by Master Series deliver particularly painful stings. How do you know which toys to buy if you’re new to impact play? For those who are new to impact play, try out a few different tools in-store. Select one very stingy instrument and an extremely thuddy one and allow strike yourself or your partner over clothing. This will provide a gauge for what toys feel like at each end of the thuddy/stingy spectrum. Paddles, floggers, crops, slappers and canes are the most popular tools for striking the behind. Most new players start out with a warm-up toy and one or two heavier impact toys. Because each toy has a truly unique sensation, and thuddy vs. stingy can be somewhat subjective, it’s common for impact play enthusiasts to curate a substantial collection of implements over time. It’s common for those that take a liking impact play to add new pieces to their collection regularly so keep exploring!

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 73

Just the Tip No Topic Is Off Limits When Emily Morse Takes Sex & Relationship Questions From “Sex With Emily” Fans by Emily Morse Have Sex Toys, Will Travel? Hi Emily, My fiancé and I have a great relationship and one of our favorite things to do is travel. My question is, what are the rules for flying with sex toys? We fly a lot and have been talking about purchasing a few toys to bring with us on our adventures, we just haven’t been sure how to go about it. What toys travel well? What might get us busted and embarrassed in a long airport line? For example, I’ve had my eye on the Magic Wand for a long time. This may sound silly, but I’m not sure if I can only fly with it in my checked bag or if I can carry it on with me. I checked online, but couldn’t find much on the TSA website (no big surprise there). Can you help us get more pleasure out of our adventures abroad?—Elizabeth 74 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 Dear Elizabeth, I LOVE this question! It’s summer, which means that everyone’s working out their traveling plans. With all the stress-inducing logistics of getting from the airport to your destination, I think it’s only fair that you deserve to be having as much fun as legally possible. And we all know that one of the best parts of every vacation is vacation sex! So why not bring some extra stimulation to enhance your adventures? Like a lot of people, you’re naturally nervous about having your most intimate sexual secrets exposed in an International Terminal as the TSA follows that mysterious buzzing sound into your carry-on. Worse yet, what if they open your suitcase and now all your fellow travelers know that you’re REALLY into anal play. But are they going to arrest you for having too much fun? Here’s the answer: no. Unless you’re flying in Alabama (which still has some bans on buying toys in state), you are certainly, legally allowed to travel with your sex toys. You can take sex toys through security (ask me about the time I was coming home from a sex toy convention in Vegas with multiple suitcases full of buzzing bunnies, wands and dildos)! Yes, you can even carry the master of all personal massagers the Magic Wand through security either tucked into your bag or walking through the terminal waving it like a fairy princess! (Although you may not want to draw that much attention.) One thing a lot of people worry about is the device turning on mid-travels. I’ve learned some creative ways to pack my toys to avoid in-flight luggage shifting inadvertently bumping the button and turning on my fully charged or battery- operated buddies. The easiest solution is The Boot Trick: tuck the toy into a boot to keep it secure. You can also wrap your toys in bubble wrap or put a cardboard tube around the part with the button (like a toilet paper or paper towel tube). Another easy fix is to take the batteries out, and replace them when you get to the hotel. For toys that use a charger, just leave them running before you pack

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 75

to drain their battery and recharge them when you reach your destination. As far as travel-friendly toys go, Fun Factory makes all their vibrators with a travel lock function specifically designed for this purpose. Here are a few of my don’t-leave-home-without- the-fun favorites: The Amorino This travel companion is considered one of the top-rated G-spot/dual stimulation toys on the market. It has an insertable shaft plus external nub for clitoral stimulation. But one of my favorite features is the yellow band! This adjustable strap twists to change the angle, shape and sensation, since there’s no such thing as one-size-fits-all pleasure. Complete with a clitoral nub this waterproof and anal-friendly vibrator is rechargeable, whisper quiet and transmits six levels of intense vibrations up and down your lady parts for a whole new sensation. The Womanizer Deluxe For the ultimate discretion, you can choose a sex toy that doesn’t look like a toy at all! This innovative German- engineered toy recreates the sensation of oral sex using multi-intensity levels of indirect clitoral stimulation. Not only is it incredibly quiet, it actually looks more like a bedazzled ear thermometer than a device. The TSA will have no idea what they’re waving through. The Magic Wand Want to skip all the fancy bells and whistles and just pack a powerful orgasmic punch? The Magic Wand is a classic that keeps people coming...back, again and again. It’s a bigger travel companion, but my Boot Trick is an easy solution to save on space. Plus, you’ve got options! You can choose between the OG version with an electrical cord or the new rechargeable model. BOTTOM LINE: No matter where in the world we travel, we can keep our sex lives interesting and fun without worrying about “getting caught” or doing something illegal. Rest assured that by bringing one of these vibrators along with you you’re not doing anything wrong. At the very worst, there could be an awkward exchange if a TSA agent isn’t quite sure what they’re holding. But in my EXTENSIVE experience, they’re always a good conversation starter! Just keep your sense of humor. Happy travels! XX Emily 76 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 How Long Should I Wait to Have Sex? Hello Emily, I’ve been listening to your podcast for two years and can’t get enough! Your advice for others has always been spot-on, so now I’ve got a question of my own. I’ve recently started to get serious about dating, and I think I’m finally ready to be in a relationship. I’ve met a couple great guys so far, but there’s one issue I keep getting hung up on: sex. I love sex and am very open, but I think that’s the problem. In the past, I’ve gotten into bed with guys pretty quickly, and it’s never turned into anything real. How long do you recommend dating someone before you start having sex?—Dee Dear Dee, First and foremost, there is nothing wrong with having a strong sexual appetite. I love that you love sex! Sex is one of the greatest pleasures we get to enjoy in our lives, and it’s a critical component of any healthy relationship. Rest assured that I’ve received countless questions about navigating sex and relationships, and I have answered many of these questions. Some include why you might not be having orgasms, how to love oral (both giving and receiving), and how to openly discuss any sex or relationship challenge with your partner. As for your question, the truth is that there just aren’t any firm rules about when to first have sex with someone you’re dating. Many women wonder if there’s a magic formula, a specific number of dates, or a length of time they should wait before hopping into bed—but it just doesn’t exist. Because there are no one-size-fits-all ”rules” in the world of love and sex, if you’re looking for a relationship (not a hookup), it’s important to figure out what feels right for you. I wouldn’t necessarily conclude that having sex “too soon” prevents the formation of a healthy relationship. There are just as many stories of people sleeping together on their first date and winding up in a relationship as there are stories of people who waited weeks to have sex and also wound up in successful partnership. What matters most is that you hold off having sex until you feel you’re ready. It’s important to remember that sex and sexual chemistry play a huge role in a serious relationship, ultimately bringing you closer to your partner. So, it’s important to know how sex affects your brain. After you get close physically, the brain releases powerful hormones, including oxytocin and dopamine, also known as the “cuddle hormones.” These hormones, while extremely pleasurable, can often trick you into confusing physical attraction with emotional attraction. This only becomes a problem when you become attached to someone you don’t know very well who, in reality, is someone you’d rather not get to know in the first place. It’s easy to convince ourselves that we really want to spend time with someone who doesn’t meet our standards or have similar interests and values due to the strong emotional attachment often grows from physical intimacy. This attachment can blind us from seeing the person for who they truly are, and, as a result, we can’t see the red flags waving all around them. In fact, you might end up in a full-blown relationship with someone you don’t even like! When you’re obsessed with the hot sex or his hot body, it’s difficult to be objective about his character. So figure out your own boundaries before you start dating, both emotional and physical. These boundaries can include only having sex with a guy who always uses protection, not having sex for the first time with someone you’re dating if you’ve had too much to drink, and refusing to engage in sex acts that aren’t comfortable for you. Or, you may want to wait to have sex until you are in a monogamous relationship with someone, and this is totally OK. When someone’s desires conflict with your boundaries, listen to your gut and stick to those boundaries. Don’t give in to any pressure. Because you feel you had sex too soon in the past, you may want to experiment and hold off having sex until you get to know someone you’re dating. By doing this, you can decide if you really are a good match for a long-term relationship. It’s also critical that you know whether he’s on the same page as you in terms of whether or not he wants a relationship. You’ll also want to figure out whether you even like spending time with him. Do you guys have fun together? Are your conversations interesting? BOTTOM LINE: the sex police don’t exist. You have every right to have sex as soon as you want—or to hold off as long as you want. By the way, you’d be surprised how exciting it is to truly get to know someone over time. In fact, sometimes this anticipation can be almost as exhilarating and gratifying as the sex itself. XX Emily

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 77

How can I make him last longer? Dear Emily, I have been with my boyfriend for four years, and love him to bits. He’s great! The only thing that kinda gets me down is that he doesn’t last as long as he used to. He says that he’s just too turned on, which I guess I understand, but he doesn’t try to help me finish. What can I do to help him last longer? And how can I get him to understand that he should be helping ME orgasm too, not rolling over and passing out? Thank you for your insight!—Miranda Dear Miranda, Okay, this is a sensitive situation, and not entirely uncommon. Men’s stamina has a tendency to fluctuate over time, so I’m not concerned here—there are plenty of ways you can work together to help him last longer – from Kegel exercises to the FDA-Compliant topical spray from Promescent. However, what I’m more concerned about is the fact that he doesn’t seem to care about pleasing you first. Whether he doesn’t realize how important your pleasure is, or he’s just playing lazy, this simply will not do. Great sex generally centers around both parties leaving satisfied, so your man needs to tune in to your sexual needs. Unfortunately men are not mind-readers, no matter how much we wish they were; the only way to help your guy make a change is to have the much-needed sex conversation. Before you launch into a lengthy discussion about your not-so- lengthy lovemaking sessions, keep in mind that this can be a very sensitive subject for men. Whether he’s suffering from premature ejaculation or is only missing the mark by a minute or two, I can guarantee that your guy is likely insecure about his current stamina. To make sure that your message is well-received, it’s time to plan out how you want to address the subject. And when it comes to these situations, timing is everything. It’s best for sex conversations to take place as far from the bedroom as possible. Would you want to receive a sexual critique in the same space you get busy? Probably not. Instead, opt for a neutral area, like in the kitchen or in the car. And whatever you do, do NOT broach the topic when you are pre- or post-coital. Trust me on this one. When it’s time to talk, keep your tone supportive and positive. Let him know that you love how turned on he gets when you’re together, but that you also have needs that are not being met. Sexual satisfaction is a team effort, after all. Luckily, there are some things you both can do that will not only help you have an orgasm, but will also help him increase his stamina. And it all starts with foreplay. Do Foreplay Your Way If you want to guarantee a solid orgasm or two, foreplay is an absolute necessity. When you jump right into intercourse without any real sort of warm up, you’re not 78 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 giving your body the chance to become fully aroused… It’s like you jumped into a play after the second act and now the whole damn story doesn’t make any sense!

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 79

The solution: step up the pre-sex activities. However much foreplay you’re currently working with, double it. Triple it, even! Whether it’s through dirty talk, touching, kissing, or a little cunnilingus, encourage your partner to commit to about 15-20 minutes of foreplay. And if he’s not sure what to do, it’s your job to show him the way. On the bright side, focusing on YOUR pleasure will help take his mind off of him getting off, thus buying him a little extra time. Pick Your Positions If your guy has it his way, he is going to select the position that feels best for him, most likely leading to power thrusts and a quick finish. Doggie-style, while certainly a favorite for the male population, is not optimal for those who are quick-on-the-draw. It allows them to pump, pump, pump their way to a speedy climax, but provides absolutely no clitoral or G-spot stimulation for you. Instead, pick a position that feels best for you and allows you more control of the speed and range of motion. Woman-on-top is great for this reason—it puts you in control, so you can move at a pace that is pleasurable for you, while also allowing for some direct clitoral contact. Press Your Buttons Speaking of the clitoris—how can this little button be so powerful and yet so often overlooked? With approximately 8,000 nerve endings packed into such a tiny space, it’s no surprise that the majority of women require clitoral attention to reach the big O. Unfortunately, the majority of sexual positions leave the C-spot out of the fun, so it’s your responsibility to bring it into play. This is perfect opportunity to bring a sex toy into the mix. I personally love the discreet, yet powerful, Lay On Rabbit vibrator by The Rabbit Company. It fits comfortably in your hand while the adorable (and functional) “bunny ears” deliver the perfect amount of vibrations to set all those nerve endings on fire. With the help of your hand-held friend, you can make sure that every minute of intercourse counts and double your odds of meeting your guy at the orgasmic finish line. Slow Things Down When in the throes of passion, it may be your man’s natural instinct to start hammering away like he’s tenderizing a steak. Little does he realize, you’re already tender. What you really need to is to be savored, slowly and deliberately, until you’re both had your fill. For many couples, slow and sensual sex is the secret to longer lasting sex sessions, not to mention increased intimacy. Encourage your partner to slow down his movements, and focus on swiveling and rocking his hips instead of thrusting. If he still gets too excited, don’t be afraid to take a quick break. He can tend to you manually or orally while he regains composure, then ease back into intercourse when you’re both ready. Just remember that you’re both in this together, Miranda. With a little patience, a bit of communication, and a whole lot of foreplay, you and your guy can absolutely get back on track. Let me know how it goes! XX Emily Dr. Emily Morse is a sex and relationship expert and host of the top downloaded podcast Sex with Emily. She has helped millions of struggling couples achieve the sex and relationships they desired in order to maintain happiness and longevity. Emily was voted the No. 1 dating and sex expert by DatingAdvice.com and the No. 1 dating and sex expert to follow on Twitter, and has proven to be the go- to for all things sex and relationships. 80 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EM B E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 81

Kinky Connection For Decades Sportsheets Has Been ‘Keeping Couples Connected’ With These Bestselling Accessories By Alex Glass F or more than 23 years Sportsheets’ mission—and tagline—has been “Keeping Couples Connected.” “It’s the cornerstone of our business,” Queenin said. “Keeping Couples Connected means, when a couple uses Sportsheets products it helps keep them together emotionally, sexually and literally connected.” The company says 70 percent of females and 62 percent of males enjoy “not-so-gentle sex.” “So the data is saying—sexperiment,” Sportsheets’ Joanne Queenin said. “A blindfold here, a spanking there, an Under The Bed Restraint System in your bedroom (or hotel room). Keep your whole relationship crisp and engaging by adding new positions, and new ‘sex-periences.’” Sportsheets has advice for couples that are looking to incorporate BDSM in the bedroom. “We first recommend talking outside of the bedroom,” Queenin says. “A big part of a good and healthy sex life is communication and trust. Times are changing. People used to think of dark dungeons or very kinky sex when they heard the words ‘BDSM’ or bondage. Now people are realizing that BDSM has many levels, many faces and many opportunities.” And how can BDSM improve a relationship? “Current research shows that years four through seven are the toughest on any relationship. The introduction of some fantasy inspiring toys and BDSM products could be just what the doctor ordered to spice up the relationship and get over that hump quickly and efficiently. Talk and ‘sexperiment’ with new positions, toys and fantasies. In a study I saw recently, it stated that 85 percent of those polled had engaged in some kind of BDSM. It’s there, it’s real and it’s not going anywhere. Sportsheets provides products for every stage of BDSM participants.” Sportsheets caters to BDSM fans new and established with collections for every level of play. Here are the company’s top five products for couples: 82 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EM B E R 2016

1 2 3 4 5 The Sportsheet Under The Bed Restraint System The Door Jam Sex Sling The Penetration Station The G-Spot Link This original Sportsheets design restrains your partner’s wrists and ankles from the sides or the top/ bottom of the bed quickly. Set up is easy. Simply slide the connection strap under the bed leaving the cuffs out. Once you are done playing, hide the cuffs under your mattress so no one knows it’s there. The Under the Bed comes with four adjustable cuffs and four adjustable restraint straps secured to one connector strap. Fits all mattresses. It’s portable and great for a surprise getaway. The Door Jam Sex Sling makes it possible to have sex while standing up! It secures over your (solid) door (see instructions on box). Made of strong, comfortable construction, the Door Jam Sex Sling includes an adjustable seat, foot rests and secured handles. It provides leverage to reach positions that were once impossible for the average person. The Sportsheets Penetration Station is designed to maximize the thrust and endurance of any position. Designed to adjust to any sized mattress, this set comes with a 15-foot center strap, four seven-foot leverage straps and four soft neoprene attachments. Sets up easily and stays hidden on your bed. Watch the included Instructional DVD for installation instructions. Best known for turning an ordinary bed into a bondage playground, the infamous Sportsheet is one of the most appropriate products for couples because “you’re only as tied up as you want to be,” the company says. The Sportsheets’ anchor pads can be attached anywhere to the sheet—along with your partner—to quickly and easily achieve new and different positions. You can also incorporate other Sportsheets products. It is available in King (fits both Eastern and Cal King) and Queen (fits both Queen and Full mattresses). The G-Spot Link, which was featured in Cosmopolitan magazine, comes with two comfortable, neoprene ankle attachments with adjustable center strap. Designed to reduce leg fatigue and lower back pressure while allowing you to hit the G-Spot every time. The G-Spot Link also makes the missionary position better! Wrap your legs around your partner and connect your ankles with the adjustable strap. Now you don’t need to hold up your legs! It comes with an instructional booklet that features new positions to explore with the G-Spot Link. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 83

Top Picks SHE Magazine Contributors Put Sex Toys to the Test 1 10-Speed Bamboo Vibe Rocks-Off, rocks-off.com I am truly in love with this 10-speed Bamboo Vibe by Rocks-Off. It is a very sleek, slim and powerful toy that is discrete enough to carry in your purse of bag. It is a great one-touch clitoral stimulator that adds to your foreplay or self-play sessions. I really enjoyed it, the vibration was not too much and it felt amazing! The rose gold color is sexy and my favorite. The 10 speeds allowed me to experience something new with each use. The design is slim with a slanted top and best of all it’s waterproof. —TAMAR A PAY TON BELL 2 1 Luxe Touch Sensitive Vibrator 2 This toy is wicked amazing. Technology has come a long way in sex toys and it’s always fun to see what they come up with next. This touch-sensitive toy has two crazy-strong motors. As your stroke it, it will vibrate faster and stronger. It works with the movements of your body to provide the best stimulation for what you are feeling. It even works in most harnesses. Plus, it has a super-strong suction cup base—I even picked up a small chair with it. It features silky smooth pure silicone and has 10 functions to cycle through. The easy push-button control makes it easy to use and handle. It is so much fun to play with. — LUCY VONNE 3 TitanMen Tools Cock Ring Set 3 Beaded Sensations Glass Dildo 4 I absolutely love glass dildos. The Beaded Sensations Glass Dildo by Adam & Eve is extremely good quality and can be used for pleasure as well as for strengthening. It’s double sided so one side can be used for Kegel exercises and the other for pure pleasure! The side with the tapered tip has nubs all over it to provide even more stimulation. My absolute favorite thing about the Beaded Sensations Glass Dildo by Adam & Eve is temperature play. When I’m on good behavior my Dom will put this in a bowl of cold ice water and the sensation (especially when blindfolded) is orgasmic. —ANTONIA HUNT Closet Collection The Alexandra Kegel Balls SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EM B E R 2016 Impulse Novelties, closetcollectiontoys.com 84 Adam & Eve, adameve.com If you are trying to keep it tight, the Closet Collection’s The Alexandra Kegel Balls are for you. I enjoyed these kegel balls because they were easy to insert and take out. Use the Alexandra Kegel Balls alone for increased muscle strength or with the soft silicone sleeve to enhance your orgasm. They are perfect alone or for couple’s play. Use these balls alone as an exerciser or during intercourse to stimulate him and increase natural vaginal lubrication. The packaging is great for both the retail store or home parties. —TAMAR A PAY TON BELL 5 They don’t come much more simple than this. A very nice touch is the tabs on both sides of the ring itself. If you have ever tried to manhandle sex toys covered in lube, you will know why these are appreciated. These tabs offer a method to apply and remove the product, making it relatively easy to do compared to other simple cock rings. Just be sure that you clean them off afterwards with warm water and soap, not by boiling or in your dishwasher or you will be left with a larger mess than you started with. — CHEL STON AND TR ACY-LYNN 4 CalExotics, calexotics.com Doc Johnson, docjohnson.com 5

6 Ever wanted to smell and taste like a delicious cupcake? Well now you can with Crazy Girl’s Flirty Body Mist in Pink Cupcake scent. It does more than just turn you into a tempting treat, it is infused with pheromones to entice those around you. Pull them in with your light and refreshing sweet scent. Includes skin nourishing ingredients that keep the skin soft and moisturized. Always ready for the touch. — LUCY VONNE 6 7 7 8 8 9 10 The Perfect Fit Clit Master by Nasstoys is amazing, powerful, and is now one of my favorite toys! When I took it out of the box, I immediately got excited because of the shape. The power is ridiculously great and took only a few seconds to take me to my wonderful place. I am fanning myself just writing this review! The Perfect Fit Clit Master is a super-sleek silicone treat topped by a tickly tip that offers direct stimulation to any area it touches. It is lightweight, ultra-manageable and discreet, perfect for playtime with a partner. A touch of a push-button at the base powers up one very impressive mode of reliable vibration and sets the silky tip to flickering. This Clit Master is made with 100 percent silicone that is 100 percent waterproof. —TAMAR A PAY TON BELL O-Wand Power Vibe NS Novelties, nsnovelties.com Perfect Fit Clit Master Nasstoys, nasstoys.com Crush Honey Pipedream has done it again with their amazing vibes. Crush Honey is on the larger end of the spectrum but extremely light and easy to handle. Crush Honey offers 10 tantalizing vibrations and there is something to be said about their choice in motor placement because it seems to hit exactly the right spots. You would think a vibe this size would be too loud to be discreet or distracting during partner play but this vibe is whisper quiet. I love the swollen tip as it’s sure to fill my inner flower and its flexible shaft is tilted just so to reach my G-spot. Crush Honey by Pipedream Products is made from Elite Silicone so its velvety smooth, you almost get aroused just stroking it. It comes in one of my favorite colors (a provocative turquoise blue). —ANTONIA HUNT 9 The Cute Bullet by ML Creation is a small, radish-sized vibrating bullet. The simple white box displays only the toy, a quick-use diagram, and the barely necessary short list of instructions. Though very simple and small, this bullet really packs a punch. It startled us the first time we turned it on. With the single button, you simply cycle through the various vibration modes. All of which, are quite intense. —TR ACY-LYNN Pipedream Products, pipedreamproducts.com Cute Bullet ML Creation, mlcreationco.com Crazy Girl Flirty Body Mist Classic Erotica, classicerotica.net 10 Oooooh this petite vibe packs a surprising punch. Usually when you see something smaller you don’t imagine it’s as powerful as this O-Wand Power Vibe is. This wand is ideal for directing sensation wherever your heart desires. It transitions nicely from sensual massage to orgasmic power play, and everything in between. It fits comfortably in the hand and is made from body-safe silicone. The O-Wand comes with seven functions and five different speeds that leave you with so many options. This vibe is great for internal and external massage. This magical gem comes in black, pink and purple and is completely waterproof. —ANTONIA HUNT S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 85

86 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EM B E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 87

11 11 Breathable Ball Gag with Cuffs CalExotics, calexotics.com CalExotics has done it again with their Scandal line.The Breathable Ball Gag with Cuffs is so submissively sexy. Perfect for both beginner and intermediate kinksters, especially those who enjoy power play and the “shut your mouth” scene without the breath play. I love versatility so I absolutely love this set. When used together the dominant is able to quiet their sub by inserting the ball gag. The gag has a vertical strap that allows it to be connected to the velcro cuffs. All pieces are adjustable so they work with various body types and positions. In addition the set can be used separately and paired with other compatible bondage pieces or used independently. The material that rests against the skin is very soft and plush, and the outer fabric is a sexy print in black and red. This is a must have kit for all into BDSM or looking to start some type of power play. —ANTONIA HUNT 12 12 Heart Vibe I love everything about this little gem. First off, the package is beautiful; it looks like an amazing gift with a wax seal to top it off. It is the perfect present for anyone. Once you open the box, you will be delighted with what you see. Don’t be fooled with the size, it packs quite the punch. With 10 speeds and pure silicone you will have hours of fun. It’s rechargeable so you never need to worry about batteries. Discreet design means no one will know what you are up to. I am keeping mine in my pocket so I am always ready for fun! — LUCY VONNE Classic Erotica, classicerotica.net 13 14 Marie Antoinette Niptyes Feeling glum because you don’t have pierced nipples but want to dress them up for a fancy occasion? No need to worry anymore with these beautiful non-piercing nipple rings. Now get the look without the pain and permanence. These vintage-inspired rings add class to any pair of nipples. Black bows made of velvet and a dangling glass pearl make my nipples look ready for any special event. My partner found them irresistible and so will yours. Who doesn’t like a dressed up nipple. — LUCY VONNE 14 Tyes by Tara, tyesbytara.com 15 Coochy Shave Crème Coochy Shave Crème is a classic when it comes to getting rid of hair on a woman’s body. It’s one of the most trusted shave crème in the industry that gives you that close shave and keeps your skin feeling great. It is designed to keep rashes and bumps away. Now they have new and delicious scents. With sweet and delicious varieties like frosted cake and floral with the Make me Blush scent. Either are sure to help you on your way to silky smooth skin with no irritation. — LUCY VONNE Rianne S, rianne-s.com 13 Closet Collection The Harlow Flutterfly Impulse Novelties, theclosetcollectiontoys.com This is one large butterfly or “flutterfly” as they are calling it. Get ready to fly away to a world of pleasure. It is made to give you full labia coverage so you will not miss a sweet spot. It’s great for those women who just love external stimulation. The ergonomically correct underside that sits on your skin has a great set of detailed ridges for stimulation. It has five strong speeds and 12 functions to play with, so you will never run out of things to do. It is made of 100 percent silicone and ABS plastic, and even comes with a one-year warranty. — LUCY VONNE 88 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T EM B E R 2016 15

16 16 This company really knows their packaging. This toy comes in a cute bag that can be kept for storage or turned into a cute makeup bag. Heck, keep both toy and makeup in there—all the important stuff. This cute clitoral stimulator has a unique moon-shaped design with two powerful motors. You can cycle through the speeds and functions with ease and recharge when done! It even has a gold colored trim for a glamorous feel. It is also waterproof for shower fun. Just what a girl needs. — LUCY VONNE 17 Master Series offers up a hefty aluminum anal plug with their “Ammo.” Leaving nothing to the imagination (which we prefer with these sort of toys). The product is proudly put on display on its package. All the important information is located on the back of the box, such as: it is six inches in length and has a diameter or 1.7 inches. Being tapered at the tip and billowing down to a moderate bulb, this piece offers the pleasure of not having any seams or fabrication bumps. From the world of butt play, we thank you for this. An interesting addition that the Master Series adds is the removable eyehook below the base. This allows you to use any potential weights or even a leash if you feel the need to kick it to a kinkier level. We admit—this product is more for those who are comfortable with their limits. This is a heavy anal plug, far from a pinky surprise in the back door. — CHEL STON AND TR ACY-LYNN 17 18 This toy is called a Rimming Plug because there are beads in the base of the butt plug that give a rimming sensation when it is fully inserted. I was worried that the beads would not turn at full function due to pressure from the sphincter muscles but boy was I wrong, this b-Vibe Rimming Plug worked to its fullest. Not only were the beads oscillating around the butt giving a rim job sensation but the second motor in the tip of the butt plug vibrates—and not only that, it also moves around like an upside down fan, so you get an awesome feeling of movement inside of you and you can change through the settings so only the rimming is on or the vibrator—or both at full force. — NICK MOHR 18 19 Satisfyer Pro 2 Satisfyer, satisfyer.com Rimming Plug b-Vibe, bvibe.com Master Series Ammo Anal Plug XR Brands, xrbrands.com Moon Rianne S, rianne-s.com The Satisfyer Pro 2 by Satisfyer is a touch-free stimulator for your clit. With its oval head and vacuum technology it provides an extra dose of pleasure when used correctly. The key is to make sure it is placed right on the clit for maximum pleasure. The stimulation is more intense when used underwater. It is 100 percent waterproof and is great for water play in the tub or shower. It is rechargeable and comes with a magnetic USB charging cable and has 11 different levels of vibration, pulsation and escalation. Its compact size allows for easy traveling. —TAMAR A PAY TON BELL 19 20 Wicked Aqua Cherry Cordial Wicked Sensual, wickedsensualcare.com Getting the formula just right for lickable and/or edible lubes is usually hit or miss with me because either there’s great flavor but the texture is off, or the texture is perfect but the flavor is subpar…Not with this. Wicked Aqua Cherry Cordial by Wicked Sensual tastes very much like a chocolate-covered cherry. There’s no aftertaste and the texture is so silky smooth. I absolutely love tasting this, so much so that I tend to slow foreplay down a lot to savor the flavor. My Dom doesn’t really like to use flavored lubes so I rubbed some in a few places beforehand and he was quite surprised when he gave those areas a lick. Needless to say he will allow this lube in the bedroom now. —ANTONIA HUNT 20 S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 89

Shop this Accessories Build-a-Boxx with Joyboxx Passionate Playground Joyboxx + Playtray is the only patent pending storage system designed for sexual health while using adult products as well as protecting products while in storage. Joyboxx is dishwasher safe, antimicrobial, locking, BPA and phthalate-free. Toys or other electronic devices can safely charge inside while locked up through the USB sized charging/ ventilation hole. Introducing “Build-a-Boxx” which allows people to mix and match the various parts of Joyboxx to create a more personalized storage system. Version 1.5 features new packaging, the new and improved Playtray in six colors and seven color sliding locks. $34.99, joyboxx.com Decor Arche Wedge Liberator Couples will last all night with the comfort provided by the Decor Arche Wedge. Designed specifically for those who love giving and receiving, the Arche Wedge has notches that allow for easier access during oral sex. Its unique arched design helps reduce neck and back strain of the giver while offering new heights of ecstasy for the receiver. The subtle sloping angle, along with firmness also helps with sexual positioning making penetration and G-spot stimulation feel effortless. It can even be used as a fulcrum point beneath the knees as it adds more oomph to pelvic thrusts. $79, liberator.com 90 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016 G-Wave Sybian The “G-Wave” is iconic sex machine Sybian’s first 100 percent medical- grade silicone insertable attachment. Carefully designed to fit the curves of a woman’s body, it features five clitoral stimulating waves located on the front portion. These waves gently massage the clitoris for maximum pleasure. The slender insertable shaft measuring three inches long with the G-spot massager at the top stimulates the g-spot with or without the rotation on. $59, sybian.com Playtray Passionate Playground The new and improved Playtray is the world’s only multipurpose adult toy “coaster,” wash and dry tray designed for large and small sex toys to set them on before, during and after use. Size: 8” x 3” Increases and promotes hygiene by preventing hair, fibers and dust from getting on a toy and allows for air-drying, the only sanitary drying method. Also prevents furniture from getting stained from lube and body fluids. Playtray is sold by itself and with Joyboxx as an internal storage box separator. Antimicrobial, dishwasher safe, food-grade plastic, PVC, BPA and phthalate-free. $7.99, joyboxx.com

Anal page! Bootie Set Fun Factory By popular demand: all three sizes of our bestselling plug in one awesome Bootie collection. Whether you want to train your butt for bigger and bigger toys (or the joys of anal intercourse.) or you simply crave variety, this kit lets you treat your booty to the Bootie plug in small, medium and large. Work your way up from the slim and beginner-friendly Bootie Small, to mid-sized Bootie Medium, to the extra-filling Bootie Large, or just switch them up according to your mood. $99.99, funfactory.com Rimming Plug b-Vibe Meet the first premium plug to incorporate rotating beads for a rimming sensation and tip vibration for orgasmic stimulation. This compact, body-safe, seamless, silicone plug is powerfully charged to stimulate all the right spots. Use with or without the wireless remote control that not only makes use a breeze, it also allows for diverse couple play possibilities. $150, bvibe.com S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 91

Fetish Surenda Silicone Cuffs Nasstoys Nasstoys Surenda Silicone Cuffs are a perfect item to a little kinky play. You will never have to worry about losing the key and they won’t damage or scratch bedposts. Surenda Silicone Cuffs can be used on both the wrists and ankles. $24, nasstoys.com Sex & Mischief Bed Bondage Restraint Kit Sportsheets International Make any bed your bondage playground with this easy to install kit. A bed restraint kit with bondage cuffs. No bed posts required. Four soft cuffs are attached to 60-inch adjustable straps. Also includes a 60-inch adjustable connector strap for a secure fit. $32.99, sportsheets.com Lubes Wet Organics Trigg Laboratories Wet Organics is a unique organic aloe based lubricant that is 100 percent natural. This lubricant formula rejuvenates your skin & your senses. It’s latex friendly and rinses away easily with warm water, leaving your skin feeling soft, never sticky. Wet® Organics can be used with most toys. $14.99, stayswetlonger.com Men’s Toys Nasstoys Travel Pump Nasstoys Nasstoys Travel Pump is a compact travel pump offers three powerful suction settings, interchangeable suction bases for maximized pleasure and packs away discreetly in what appears to be a zippered shaving kit bag. $59.99, nasstoys.com 92 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 93

Quest Rocks-Off Quest is your guide in a world of sensual discovery. Find confidence and control on the path to new pleasures. Quest is a slim and unintimidating vibrator for first time prostate explorers and prostate thrill-seekers. Tease your senses for exciting new sexual experiences. You can take control of your own or a partner’s pleasure with 10 exhilarating vibration and pulsation settings. Compact and stylish, Quest is designed with the discerning explorer in mind. $37.49, rocks-off.com Sex Enhancer pjur Man Xtend pjur Xtend with its invigorating paprika extract, rejuvenates the skin, is a double-effect water- based massage gel created for men who prefer intense massage. This performance-enhancing massage formula is hypoallergenic, safe for intimate areas, and ideal for daily use. $24.99, pjur.com Sugar Cum Hipleasures Inc Sugar Cum is an all-natural supplement that sweetens the body’s personal fluids. You simply take 2 capsules 1 hour before sexual activity. Our special formulation of extracts and you body’s pH levels work together to neutralize and improve the taste of male and female secretions. Sugar Cum is an affordable alternative that can keep you tasting good for your partner or paramour. Two capsules of Sugar Cum should be taken on a daily basis as part of your regular diet for maximum results. $49.99, hipleasures.com Sexual Health Evi Aneros The anatomically designed Evi by Aneros for women requires no vibration and offers users a sensual, hands-free experience like no other. Evi also offers the ability to strengthen pelvic floor muscles which help a woman perform a strong vise-like grip during intercourse; enhance arousal through increased blood flow; have 94 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 95

multiple, more intense orgasms, more often; enhance bladder control; and facilitate healthy pregnancy, leading to easier delivery and post-partum recovery. $54.95, 713-680-8840 Secret Passion Caution Wear Corp. Secret Passion—studded (enhanced pleasure) latex condom lubricated with silicone-based lubricant. This new condom brand is part of our new line of condoms called L.A. Confidential, which stands for Love Accessory Confidential. $9.95, cautionwearcorp.com Stimulating Topicals Buzz Liquid Vibrator Doc Johnson Buzz is a stimulating clitoral gel formulated with natural ingredients that tingles on contact, creating a pleasant buzzing sensation to heighten the user’s pleasure and arousal. Only one to three drops are needed per session, making the 7mL tube a generous supply. Buzz Liquid Vibrator has a three-year shelf life and light, sweet scent, and is Proudly Made in America in an ISO-certified lab and FDA registered test facility. Free from parabens, glycerin, and sugar. $19.90, docjohnson.com Hot Ball Plus— Hot & Ice Hot Flowers Unmistakable quality, it could be only Hot Flowers. Now, the pleasure ball will allow you an additional touch in your relationship. Insertable ball with gelatin cover, Hot Ball Plus—Hot & Ice will give a stimulating and alternating feeling of warmth and freshness on the skin. Each pack contains two balls. You can find Hot Ball Plus in different packs: Hot, Shock and Ice. $8.94, hotflowersusa.com 96 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016

Vibrators Black Bling G-Spot Rabbit The Rabbit Company Diamonds are a girl’s best friend. The Black Bling G-Spot Rabbit from The Rabbit Company is a surefire way to experience all the pleasures of G-Spot stimulation. The G-Spot Rabbit was designed to help women pinpoint this elusive hot spot. This Limited Edition Crystalized Rabbit is also available in Classic, and they are as beautiful to look at as they are pleasurable to use. These beautiful crystalized pieces are perfect to gift to your special someone or to treat yourself to something extra special. $219, therabbitcompany.com Cayona Fun Factory You’ll want to do a lot more than admire this floral vibe. With its delicate curves and comfortably flexible tip, Cayona is an excellent option for people who want to experience both external vibration and G-spot teasing without a phallic shape. With two prominent points of contact, this vibe invites you to get creative with powerful vibrations that are equally strong from its tip to its petals. $99.99, funfactory.com Eva Dame Products Eva is a hands-free, distraction-free vibrator designed to provide women the clitoral stimulation they want during penetrative sex. Staying in place with the help of two flexible wings, which tuck under the labia, Eva gives you a boost of stimulation while leaving your hands free to move around and focus on intimacy. $105, dameproducts.com Foreplay Frenzy—Bunny CalExotics Perfectly sized dual stimulator with accentuated G-spot curve and dual motors with 12 intense functions of vibration, pulsation and escalation. The Foreplay Frenzy Bunny features a state-of-the-art memory chip that resumes on last function used. Designed to flex and move with you. $38.99, calexotics.com S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 97

LUXE Touch-Sensitive Vibrator CalExotics Technologically advanced touch sensor vibrator. The deeper you stroke, the stronger the power. Luxe features 10 functions of intense vibration, pulsation and escalation. It has a sturdy suction cup base that attaches to most flat surfaces and is harness compatible. $99.99, calexotics.com Magic Wand Original Magic Wand America’s favorite personal massager delivers deep, powerful, pleasure-filled vibrations. A best seller for over 30 years, the Magic Wand Original is loved by lovers and recommended by therapists. Unparalleled power. The “Cadillac of vibrators.” “Top-10 Gadget of All Time” (Time Magazine, 2016). Best Sex Toy for Women (SHE Awards, 2015). Formerly known as the Hitachi Magic Wand. Price available upon request, vibratex.com Passion Primer Getting in the Mood Getting in the Mood’s signature patent-pending product (Passion Primer) consists of a non-penetrating, non-phallic shaped massager that heats and is accompanied with interchangeable textured covers. The heat feature is designed to cover the clitoris for a direct warming and cupping sensation. Resembling the household computer mouse, the device is perfect for women seeking something discreet and innocent. $99.95, passionprimer.com Petite Sensations: Bubbles Rocks-Off Feel your body tremble with pleasure as you insert each bubble and embrace the rising arousal as their girth widens. Bubbles’ firm T-shaped base will vibrate and pulsate on your highly sensitive area as it firmly fits between your cheeks. Bubbles’ seven vibrations and pulsations settings and ultra-soft silicone are designed to ease every push towards you experiencing ultimate arousal. $29.99, rocks-off.com Satisfyer Pro 2 EIS GmbH The Satisfyer Pro 2 features waterproof and hygienic technology and provides a touch- free stimulation through tingling pulsation and pressure waves. A modern lifestyle product that fascinates every woman. From August onwards Satisfyer automatically delivers the new generation of its top-selling product Pro 2. $89.99, satisfyer.com 98 SHE MAGAZINE // S E P T E M B E R 2016

Sola Cue Meet Sola Designed specifically for G-spot stimulation, Sola Cue comes equipped with 10 unique vibration functions: five vibration speeds and five vibration rhythms. Two-button control makes it easy to go back and forth between functions. To recharge the Sola Cue, connect the USB wire to the magnetic charging port. $106, meetsola.com Sybian Sybian Since its introduction in 1987 the iconic Sybian is still the most sophisticated sexual aid available on the market today. Sybian’s unrivaled powerful design and variety of attachments enable users to heighten their sexual responsiveness and achieve maximum pleasure. Sybian offers a wide range of attachments including new silicone attachments the G-Wave and Orb made of 100 percent medical grade silicone with more silicone attachments slated for release in 2016 and 2017. $1,345, sybian.com TRYST Multi Erogenous Zone Massager Doc Johnson Created to provide satisfying stimulation to many areas of the body, TRYST offers something for everyone. This new and highly anticipated vibrating massager was designed for versatile use and whole-body enjoyment by any individual or couple. Users will enjoy TRYST’s ergonomic base and curved arms as an external or insertable vibrator, wearable c-ring for solo or partner play, or gentle clamp-style massager applying pleasurable pressure to the clitoris or nipples. Available in Black (pictured) and Purple. $113.42, docjohnson.com Zoo IMTOY IMTOY’s ZOO range of vibrators (Giraffe, Gazelle and Rhino) will be available in the U.S. in September to awaken your wild nature and playful imagination. Use the vibrators manually or connect them via Bluetooth using the exclusive and free Zoo App allowing you to unlock exciting features to spice up the bedroom like shaking mode— where you can shake the phone to cause the vibrator to vibrate accordingly—or create and record your own vibrating patterns. $75, imtoy.com S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 99

Sex in the News Powered by First Gay Couple Makes History On Nickelodeon For the first time in the history of Nickelode- on, which is owned by Viacom (Paramount Pictures, MTV, etc.), a same sex couple will appear on an animated cartoon series. Wayne Brady and Michael McDonald will be the voices of the married, bi-racial couple. According to The Hollywood Reporter, the series focuses on the life of Lincoln Loud and his 10 sisters. Harold and Howard were weaved into the story because they are the parents of Clyde McBride, Lincoln’s friend. In a clip posted on Twitter, the two Dads walk Clyde over to Lincoln’s house to drop him off for a sleepover. When Lincoln opens the door, he says, “Hey Clyde. Hi Mr. McBride. Hi Mr. McBride.” In The Loud House, Clyde is Lincoln’s best friend and a main character on the series. In 2014, The Disney Channel broke similar barriers when live-action comedy Good Luck Charlie introduced a gay couple, reports The Reporter. Since the announcement, the epi- sode has been censored in gay in Africa, and all of the TV stations in there have banned it. Science Says Women Turned On By Men Doing Housework For any woman who gets turned on watching her husband washing the dishes, you are not alone, apparently. A study found that “when couples share similar tasks rather than different, gender-ste- reotyped ones, it seems to deepen desire.” Sex tips for guys: Wash the dishes and you’ll totally get laid more often. “Contemporary couples who adhere to a more egalitarian division of labor are the only couples who have experienced an increase in sexual frequency compared to 100 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016 their counterparts of the past,” says the au- thor of the study, Dr. Sharon Sassler, PhD, of Cornell University. Historian Stephanie Coontz notes, “Our ideals of heterosexual love have changed.” Love used to be seen as the attraction of op- posites, and each partner in a marriage spe- cialized in a unique set of skills, resources, and emotions that, it was believed, the other gender lacked. Today, love is based on shared interests, activities, and emotions. Where difference was once the basis of desire, equality is increasingly becoming erotic.” According to the researchers, ”Conven- tional roles used to trigger relationship satisfaction and sexual frequency, with “traditionally masculine and feminine be- haviors consciously or unconsciously turn- ons.” “Feelings of fairness and satisfaction with the division of housework are central to couples’ relationship satisfaction, which is strongly related to sexual intimacy.” All we can say is “You’re so hot when you’re vacuuming.” Your Worst Sex Fears (According to Science) What do men and women worry about when they have sex with a new person? A British online drug company, Superdrug, asked 1,212 males and 916 females what they feared most when “doing it” with someone for the first time. Men’s biggest fear is that the other per- son has an STI, while women’s biggest fear is that the guy won’t wear a condom, and will give her an STI. (Our advice here: when a guy won’t wear one, you tell him “Put this on your wang, or we don’t bang.”) The second fear of men was not giving an orgasm to/not satisfying the other person. This fear was followed by the dreaded fear of premature ejaculation. (Our advice here: slow down and don’t be so anxious to stick it in.) For women, another fear is a broken con- dom, and a partner not taking “no” for an answer. Both men and women said they feared the other person “not finding your naked body attractive,” but women worried about it more than men did. Fears that were lower on the list includ- ed men worrying that they can’t perform and women worrying that he will want to do something she’s not comfortable with. Our advice here: Discuss first before letting someone tie you up to the refrigerator. Millennials Having Way Less Sex Than Gen X or Baby Boomers Millennials are not getting laid as much as their parents did at the same age, according to a new study published in The Archives of Sexual Behavior. Millennials were born roughly from 1983-2000. And the younger the Gen Y millennial is, the less sex he or she is having. Their parents, Baby Boomers and Gen X’rs, did not use the internet as much when they were 19-29, so research- ers think all the Tindering, Grindering, and Facebooking people are doing leads to less sex. And why is this? It’s complicated. Unlike divorced daters over 50 who are

apparently getting laid like crazy, 20-some- things who date online say they don’t meet as much face-to-face, which is weird con- sidering they spend all day swiping and messaging each other. “When it comes time to meet, I get ’ghosted’ and the guy never follows up,” reports my 21-year-old female cousin. Millennials of both sexes are also terrified of getting STDs which is another big reason. Add the fear of emo- tional involvement and dating sites “filled with douchebags who think they deserve at least a 9” says my (hot) cousin, and people get laid less than we thought they did. Another component is fear and anxiety about consent, from both boys who are not sure exactly how to ask for consent, and girls who fear getting date raped by the bro they just met on Tinder. Another big reason for less sex is that more people in their 20s are still living with their parents, which is always a sexy-time killer. The study was conducted by Jean Twenge who wrote “Generation Me; Why Today’s Young Americans Are More Con- fident,” “Assertive, Entitled,—and More Miserable Than Ever Before,” and Brooke Wells from Widener University. They re- port that 20-somethings “showed elevated rates of adult sexual inactivity.” F*cking New York: A New Book That Fucks NYC New York City is one of the most intense, throb- bing cities in the world, and a new book pon- ders what it would be like fucking it. Or fuck- ing with it. Fucking New York is a collection of bad ass, “fuck you I don’t care what you think” photos of women humping hoods of police cars, rubbing themselves against fire hydrants, stripping off their clothes in the middle of the street, and smashing their boobs up against glass windows. Fuck yeah. “The book brought together New York- ers of all ages, shapes, sizes, social, and eth- nic backgrounds” says Nikola Tamindzic, a Serbian-American photographer who chronicled the wild nightlife of the city in Gawker for ten years. “New York is like that bad boy or a girl you always wanted to make your own, and never quite could, but man, the sex was always amazing,” he says. Models in the coffee table art book include writers, artists, fashion models, activists, and porn star Stoya. “Those people brought the mix of intense carnality and playful hu- mor I was looking for” says Mr. Tamindzic. Like New York City itself, the subver- sively playful book is a contradictive com- bination of glamorous, gritty, exciting, re- bellious, confident, strange, sophisticated, edgy, wild, sexy, creative, and fun. In addition to the photographs them- selves, the book will also feature conversa- tions about the book and the issues it raises, including “the male gaze”, nudity, and sexual politics. It’s wildly sexy and fun. We fucking love it. Charlize Theron Promotes Sex Ed in Africa Using her fame to talk about a topic most people don’t talk about, the glamorous Char- lize Theron makes sex education in Africa her cause. Her charity, the Charlize Theron Africa Outreach Foundation, educates and empowers tween and teenage girls about sex. South Africa has the highest rate of HIV in the world, with a shocking 40.7 percent. “I think we are breaking through this barrier that it is not cool to talk about sex,” says Miss Theron. The Oscar-winning actress recently do- nated money to WhizzKids, an adolescent “sexual health clinic and youth center” for girls. It offers “a complete package of pre- vention, care, treatment and support ser- vices, including teaching young girls that they can say no to anything they are uncom- fortable with.” WhizzKids “uses football as an educational tool to engage local youth and facilitate healthy behavior change.” Theron’s foundation chose this chari- ty because they “provide services relat- ed to the social and structural drivers of HIV/AIDS such as sexual and reproduc- tive health education, access to adoles- cent-friendly health services, psychosocial support, and peer counseling.” “The idea of raising your hand and ask- ing questions about sex in front of your peers was just something that was never heard of,” she told Times Live in South Af- rica. “I think it is changing. It has to change because it is the only way to save lives.” “AIDS is the No. 1 killer of teens in Africa and it is the No. 2 killer of teenagers glob- ally,” she adds. “This is not just an African issue. We can stop AIDS.” And The Best Time for Sex Is… What time is best for sex, according to the sex o’clock? According to one study, men are horniest at exactly 7:54 a.m. in the morning and wom- en at 11:21 p.m. at night. The study, from U.K. sex toy company Lovehoney calculated the times people said they felt most like doing it. One of the most common complaints cou- ples have in sex therapist’s offices, whether hetero or same sex, it that one person never wants to do it when the other person does. Women said they were most in the mood between 11 p.m. and 2 a.m., most likely due to finally relaxing their minds and not fo- cusing on stressful events from the day. Men said they had boner problems first thing in the morning, from 6 a.m. to 9 a.m. THE TIME OF DAY MEN & WOMEN DESIRE SEX Men Women 9 am-1 pm 28% 10% 11% 9% 1 pm-4 pm 5% 8% 4 pm-6 pm 3% 4% 7 pm-8 pm 5% 6% 6 am-9 am 8 pm-9 pm 10% 9% 9 pm-11 pm 18% 22% 11 pm-2 am 16% 3% 25% 3% 2 am-6 am Another study claims that 3 p.m. is the ideal time for sexy time, when most people are at work. This is due to a woman’s corti- sol levels and energy at their highest. Hor- mone expert Alisa Vitti told the Daily Mail it was “the perfect compromise for both sex- es’ satisfaction, with men giving women the ‘emotional support’ they crave while still getting plenty of enjoyment.” So for those of you not at work, we en- courage trying a little “afternoon delight.” —Anka Radakovich (@ankarad) S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 101

Sex Toy News Doc Johnson Appears on Showtime’s ‘Ray Donovan’ NORTH HOLLYWOOD, CALIF.— Doc Johnson has announced its products were featured on this weekend’s episode of “Ray Donovan,” Showtime’s hit series starring Liev Schreiber, Paula Malcomson and Jon Voight. In the second episode of the fourth season, “Marisol,” characters Bunchy (Dash Mihok) and his wife Teresa (Alyssa Diaz) are in the midst of a dilemma: her libido is sky-high and Bunchy is having a hard time keeping up. Abby (Paula Malcomson) suggests that he get her a sex toy—she takes Bunchy to pick one out, and they pore over a wall of Doc John- son products. “‘Ray Donovan’ is such a fantastic show; it’s truly an honor to be featured so prominently in their latest episode,” said Chad Braverman, Doc Johnson’s COO/CCO. “When the series approached us last year for product, we were incredibly flattered. “We’ve had great success over the past few years in earning top placements on network and cable programming, as well as in main- stream movies, and we are thrilled at the exposure this most recent appearance will bring for Doc Johnson,” he added. For more information on Doc Johnson products or for catalogs and supplements, marketing materials including posters, signage and plan-o-grams, visit Doc Johnson’s online B2B Resource Center at B2BDocJohnson.com. For sales inquiries, contact sales@docjohnson.com. The Shegasm by Inmi offers oral sex-like stimulation New Suction Clit Stimulator ‘Shegasm’ Debuts HUNTINGTON BEACH, CALIF.— XR Brands has introduced the Shegasm Cli- toral Stimulator, a new handheld device that, according to an XR spokesperson, “envelops the clitoris with vibration and powerful variable-speed suction.” “Perfect for women who love the sensations of receiving oral sex, this sex toy delivers in ways that standard vibrators simply can’t and elevates pleasure to orgasmic heights,” a spokesperson for XR Brands said. Rebecca Weinberg, director of sales and marketing for XR Brands, said, “The Shegasm is the latest high-end release from the Inmi brand and enables women to experience intense orgasms with little to no effort, thanks to a suction stimulation method that works with the vibration.” The Shegasm by Inmi is 6.75 inches long and two inches at its wid- est point with a wireless, USB-rechargeable design. “We designed the Inmi brand to stand out in the saturated luxury 102 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 103

market with innovative items that all perform above and beyond the typical vibrators out there on the market,” Weinberg said. “And that’s precisely what the Shegasm delivers.” Rocks-Off Gets Exposure in The Sun The Ruby Glow is a sit-on vibe that’s perfect for the office, says The Sun. LONDON— Rocks-Off landed addition- al mainstream media coverage after ap- pearing in the U.K. tabloid newspaper The Sun. Rocks-Off gets praises in an article titled, “How to Have the Best Sex To- night: An Hour-by-Hour Guide to Get You in the Mood.” Ruby Glow, the sit-on vibrator, is mentioned for being an arousing way to beat the afternoon slump in the office. “Wait until your colleagues have left the office for a coffee break then give yourself a whole new type of buzz with a discreet personal massager that is designed to be placed on a wom- an’s office chair so she can sit on it and turn herself on,” the piece read. The Ruby Glow recently came second in a vibrator test by lead- ing women’s lifestyle magazine Good Housekeeping. It was called “revolutionary and great for disabled people as it’s hand- free” by popular British sexologist Tracey Cox on the U.K. daytime TV show “This Morning.” The Ruby Glow’s inventor, erotic fiction writer Tabitha Rayne, said: “What a super article about how to get yourself in the mood throughout the day. The Ruby Glow can certainly be a part of that and I’m very excited that they’ve picked up on it. Anticipation is a real aphrodisiac and exploring your own erogenous zones while apart is a wonderful way to ignite passion when you get together again.” Tickler Releases 2 New Toyfriends The Peggy Vibrating Egg is remote-controlled. STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN— Swedish sex accessory brand Tickler headed by designer Eric Kalén has launched two new products, the Peggy Vi- brating Egg and Rosy Flexi- ble Wand. According to the company, the new items are its first new release since the Buddy erection holder hit the market in early 2015. Tickler’s Peggy is Tickler’s first rechargeable product. “We have stepped up one level this time and made our first USB re- chargeable product, Peggy Vibrating Egg,” Kalen said. “We have always taken pride in making high-quality products with great design and func- tionality and adding a twist to make them special. Our idea is to make products using the best materials, motors and technology available in combination with a thought-through design but still at a very affordable price. This time we have reinvented a well proven best-selling product, 104 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 105

the vibrating egg, and just taken it to a new level.” Peggy is app-free but comes with a remote that allows the egg to operate from up to 20 meters away. The Rosy Flexible Wand features dual motors and is made of silicone. “I truly enjoy developing and design products and I love to make small innovations and find new angles on existing products,” Kalen said. “Why reinvent the wheel...? I think that especially Peggy is a great example of this. So I hope a lot of people buy them and enjoy them!” Peggy’s MSRP is $99 and Rosy’s MSRP is $69. Screaming O Tests Newest Releases for Safety LOS ANGELES— Screaming O has completed and passed its latest round of product materials testing, confirm- ing that its colorful True Silicone and brightly hued sex toy materials are non-toxic and body-safe. Screaming O conducts these semi- annual materials testing reports as part of its commitment to consum- ers of all kinds. The company contracts Polymer Solutions, an inde- pendent laboratory, and a separate third-party verifier to maintain regular testing of each material in its catalog and is now testing most products prior to their industry releases. “Our materials testing initiative has been going strong for a year and a half now and has become a standard part of our development process,” Screaming O Account Executive Conde Aumann said. “We stand by the quality of every item in our catalog, and materials data from Polymer Solutions gives current and potential customers an important reason to trust Screaming O and our product line. We use materials that are proven and verified to be body-safe and it’s a com- mitment we take very seriously.” Screaming O also uses a universal labeling system on all new pack- aging, featuring icons that inform shoppers of what each product is made of. New Fifty Shades Official Toys in the Works Lovehoney co-founders Neal Slateford and Richard Longhurst have extended their deal with “Fifty Shades” author E L James for more branded toys. BATH, ENGLAND— Lovehoney has extended its agreement with author E L James to give the U.K.-based sex toy manufacturer exclusive world- wide rights to produce Fifty Shades of Grey branded pleasure products through 2018. The company first secured the worldwide rights to the Fifty Shades of Grey brand in 2012. The Of- ficial Pleasure Collections have since sold more than 2 million units worldwide and picked up numerous awards, including a 2015 LIMA 106 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

Licensing Award. Lovehoney cofounder Neal Slateford said, “The Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy completely transformed the market for pleasure products. It bridged the gap between adult and the mainstream and introduced a whole new audience to the joy of sex toys. We’re delighted to have extended our relationship with E L James and her team. We have ex- citing plans for developing the brand.” E L James added, “I’m thrilled to be extending the Fifty Shades partnership with Lovehoney. It’s a wonderful British company run by amazing, creative people who really care for their customers and for fans of the Fifty Shades story. Our work together has been a huge suc- cess, and long may that continue.” Lovehoney says it is looking forward to the next two movie adapta- tions of the books, “Fifty Shades Darker” and “Fifty Shades Freed,” in February 2017 and 2018 respectively. The latest upcoming additions to the collection include Fifty Shades Darker—The Official Pleasure Collection and the limited edition No Bounds Collection. eSensual Group Says Audio Experience Promotes ‘Multiple Orgasms’ The eSensual Group offers “professional audio experiences to create and enhance exceptional sexual experiences.” LONDON— The eSensual Group has announced the availability of Direct- ed Erotic Visualization (DEV), de- scribed as “an audio experience that harnesses the power of the mind to create very real scenarios that cause intense multiple orgasm in both women and men.” With DEV, according to the eSen- sual Group, the experience is quite realistic. A “conservative estimate,” according to the eSensual Group, would indicate that DEV “is responsible for more than 6.8 million hands-free orgasms since Essemoh Teepee created the technique in 2008.” Susana Mayer, PhD, a clinical sexologist, said, “I created a comfort- able environment to enjoy my personalized audio experience. What fol- lowed totally astonished me. While listening to the story and eventually being directed to orgasm—well, let’s just say it worked.” According to the eSensual Group, “DEV works with the mind to ac- cess an altered state that takes you to an erotic, sensual place. (This is) not hypnosis; there is no trance or loss of consciousness. Participants remain awake, though relaxed, and fully aware of the process and their own sensuality. The overlay of erotic story with detailed sensory description spoofs your mind into thinking that you are actually expe- riencing those sensations.” Genevieve Ash and Essemoh Teepee are partners in Alternatepress Limited and the eSensual Group. “They are dedicated to providing in- telligent erotic fiction and professional audio experiences to create and enhance exceptional sexual experiences,” the eSensual Group said. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 107

Lovehoney Debuts Mötley Crüe Collection The Official Mötley Crüe Collection features vibes emblazoned with the band’s distinctive typography and album artwork. BURBANK, CALIF.— Lovehoney recent- ly unveiled its new collaboration with rock legends Mötley Crüe. The Official Mötley Crüe Collection comprises a set of eight mini and mi- di-sized vibrators, emblazoned with the band’s iconic typography and distinc- tive artwork, as featured on classic al- bums “Girls Girls Girls,” “Shout At The Devil,” ‘Too Fast For Love” and more. Lovehoney Sales Manager Sabrina Earnshaw said, “We’re thrilled to be able to add some true rock icons to our catalog with the Official Mötley Crüe Collection. “The eight eye-catching vibes capture the style and sex appeal of the band perfectly and deliver the power and pleasure you’d expect from ‘The World’s Most Notorious Rock Band.’” Global Merchandising Services, Inc brokered the deal. Global Merchandising’s Group Executive Chairman, Barry Drink- water said, “Global is excited to be rockin’ our clientele in such a fast growing industry. We like nothing better than making the fans happy… and we’re thrilled to be partnering with Lovehoney.” The range is set to arrive in retail stores in September. The band—made up of Vince Neil (vocals), Mick Mars (guitar), Nik- ki Sixx (bass) and Tommy Lee (drums)—has sold 100 million albums globally, with countless sold-out tours, playing to millions of fans, the company says. Kama Sutra Company Unveils Toy Line After 47 years of offering body care products, Kama Sutra has expanded into toys. THOUSAND OAKS, CALIF. — The Kama Sutra Company has unveiled its first line of pleasure instruments, Rhythm by Kama Sutra. For the past 47 years The Kama Sutra Company has offered couples-friendly body products. Featuring five pleasure instruments, Rhythm by Kama Sutra also comes with high-end display and packag- ing. Made from the high quality medical-grade silicone and equipped with powerful, whisper-quiet motors, Kama Sutra says all Rhythm pleasure instruments are crafted to meet high standards. Kama Sutra President Marla Lee said, “Customers will quickly see… and feel… that although we waited 47 years to enter the toy business, it was definitely worth the wait! We put all of our energy into every detail of our five custom instruments. While style and quality are so import- ant, we knew we couldn’t deny what everyone really wants, and that’s power. I think we did a great job at achieving both.” Rhythm by Kama Sutra will be on retail shelves this fall. 108 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

HiPleasures Unveils ‘Soul on Fire’ Coaching Program New York City-based wellness guru Natalia Maldonado (below) is joining forces with HiPleasures for a 90-day coaching program. MIAMI— Adult wellness and health company HiPleasures is offering an exclusive 90-day coaching program. HiPleasures CEO Brittani Feinberg, along with New York City-based well- ness guru Natalia Maldonado, have come together to offer a program call Soul on Fire—which, according to HiPleasures, is designed “to help their clients become physically, emotionally, mentally and sexually fit.” The Soul on Fire program, HiPleasures said, “offers extremely per- sonalized service, including weekly one-on-one coaching calls, private coaching calls on Skype, customized meal and workout plans, daily vid- eos for inspiration, weekly challenges and assignments and inclusion in a private Facebook group that has daily motivations, tips and a Q&A.” At the end of the program, participants will receive a 90-day supply of HiPleasures’ product Sugar Cum along with a “Be a Warrior for Love, Orgasms and Freedom” t-shirt. In late October, Feinberg and Maldonado will offer a full-day workshop in New York City. Feinberg said, “We’re on taking 10 people on for the program so we can offer such individualized service, which will change anyone who participates from the inside out. It’s about sexual and all around well- ness to make not only your sex life better, but also, your world better. We’re very excited to offer a program like this.” For more information on the Soul on Fire program, visit this HiPleasures.com. ‘Fifty Shades Darker’ Lingerie Collection Is in the Works The upcoming range of Fifty Shades Darker lingerie includes pieces inspired by the book, including styles named Red Room, Escala, Masquerade, Goddess, Steele and Anastasia. LONDON— A new “Fifty Shades Dark- er”-inspired lingerie collection has been created by Coco de Mer, which has worked with “Fifty Shades of Grey” author E.L. James to develop the range. Coco de Mer said that their Fif- ty Shades Darker lingerie “is being launched to coincide with the release of the new ‘Fifty Shades Darker’ film, starring Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson—which comes out globally around Valentine’s Day next year.” The new lingerie, which will go on sale in September, is inspired by the character Anastasia Steele’s “growth in sexual confidence as she gradually takes the dominant role in her relationship with billionaire Christian Grey,” according to Coco de Mer. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 109

Coco de Mer Managing Director Lucy Litwack said, “’Fifty Shades Darker’ documents Anastasia’s growth in self-worth, which has a knock- on effect on her relationship with Christian. She is now more in control. It’s as if the roles have been reversed. Ana starts to uncover her underly- ing sexual desires, becoming more liberated in and out of the bedroom.” Litwack said, “Taking inspiration from the Seattle skyline and the pivotal masquerade ball, the collection focuses on empowering wom- en while remaining feminine and sophisticated.” E.L. James said, “I took inspiration from Coco de Mer when I was writing the books and visited the boutique in Covent Garden as part of my research. Fifty Shades Darker Lingerie really captures Ana’s sexu- al awakening. It is luxurious, deeply provocative and elegantly erotic.” Items in Coco de Mer’s Fifty Shades Darker Lingerie Collection in- clude Red Room, Escala, Masquerade, Goddess, Steele and Anastasia. Lovehoney Owners Meet the Queen Richard Longhurst and Neal Slateford, Lovehoney’s co- founders, were invited to Buckingham Palace. BATH, ENGLAND— Lovehoney’s co-owners Richard Longhurst and Neal Slateford have returned to their Bath headquarters after a reception hosted by the Queen at Bucking- ham Palace. Longhurst and Slateford met the Queen, Prince Philip and other senior royals at a cel- ebration for Queen’s Award winners on July 14, the company reports. Lovehoney received the Queen’s Award for Enterprise in International Trade for outstanding growth in overseas sales over the last three years. The award—described as “the highest accolade for business suc- cess”—allows Lovehoney to use The Queen’s Award emblem in ad- vertising, marketing and on packaging for a period of five years as a symbol of quality and success. Slateford said, “It’s a huge privilege for Lovehoney to be honored by the Queen. The Queen is Britain’s greatest trade ambassador and consumers trust a brand with her patronage. It just shows how far we have come as a company and how sex toys are becoming more and more mainstream.” While at the palace, Slateford and Longhurst said they spoke with a number of royals and enjoyed meeting fellow Queen’s Award winners from across the country. Slateford added, “We said hello to the Queen, and thanked her for having us over. We mentioned to The Duke of Edinburgh that we were in the sexual wellbeing business. He nodded and smiled, swiftly made his excuses and moved on. “Richard was just happy to meet a real Princess (Princess Michael of Kent), as he’s met all the ones at Disneyland already.” The pair started selling sex toys online 14 years ago, with stock kept under Longhurst’s bed, and now run a booming international compa- ny that holds the worldwide license to manufacture the official Fifty Shades of Grey sex products. The company employs more than 200 people at its Locksbrook Road headquarters. 110 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 111

Obsessive Fans Are Led to Pokémoan Sex Toys Pokémon fandom has reached a new level. BRISBANE, AUSTRALIA— Australian Etsy online retailer GeekySexToys, which bills itself as “Toys for the Naughty Nerd,” has rolled out a pleasure prod- ucts line that is sure to charge up Pokémon Go fans. GeekySexToys’ new line of silicone toys, called Pokémoan, is based on the original starter Pokémon, with the collector set including Bulby, Charmy, Squirty and Piky—in lieu of the original Pokémon Go names Bulbasaur, Charmander, Squirtle and Pikachu. “Become the ultimate Pokémoan master with your new silicone friends,” the company said on marketplace site Etsy. “Let your imagi- nation run wild as you play under the sheets.” Each of the new sex toys have descriptions that Pokémon Go fans might moan for, including: Bulby—A grass type Pokémoan. Bulby has a large seed tip making it a very pleasurable friend to have. “Charmy—A slightly thinner, fire type Pokémoan with a flaming tail. Charmy gives intense orgasms everywhere it goes. “Squirty—A water Pokémoan. Squirty has a smooth round head with a large grooved turtle shell on its back. “Piky—This small electric type anal Pokémoan is a perfect size for the average Pokémoan trainer. Piky is an extremely cute yet essential addition to your team.” GeekySexToys, in its marketing materials, steered clear on whether the company has any licensing agreements with the owners of the game— The Pokémon Company and Niantic Labs, the developer who previously created the similar augmented reality game Ingress as part of Google. Prices start at $50 per Pokémoan character and $199 for the set at GeekySexToys. Jimmyjane Releases Ascend Flexible Vibrators The Ascend 7 is a double-ended vibe with a motor on each end that can be used for internal and external stimulation. SAN FRANCISCO— Design-centric brand Jimmyjane has introduced the Live Sexy line of Ascend Flex Vi- brators. Each of the four shapes in the line features a flexi- ble design encased in smooth, body-safe silicone. The collection offers designs for novice and advanced toy users at mid-tier prices. Each of the Ascend products offers a flexible fea- ture, adding either comfort or versatility to the experience and use. Ascend Flex Vibrators feature three intensity levels and three modes, all operated by a one-button control. The items are waterproof, USB rechargeable and made with body-safe phthalate-free silicone. The collection includes the Ascend 1 Flexible Pebble Vibrator, As- cend 2 Dual Clitoral Vibrator, Ascend 4 Dual Vibrating Massager and Ascend D 7 Dual-Ended Vibrator. Each Ascend vibrator comes in pink or purple and retails for $80- 100 MSRP.0. 112 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 113

Empowered Products Releases Fetish by Gun Oil Fetish by Gun Oil is a garment conditioner for latex and rubber clothes. LAS VEGAS— Empowered Products has ventured into the fetish and latex/rubber market with its introduction of Fetish by Gun Oil Silicone Dressing Aid and Garment Conditioner. Fetish by Gun Oil is a silicone dressing aid and gar- ment conditioner for latex, rubber and fetish enthusi- asts. It is available now in the U.S., Canada, U.K., Eu- rope, Asia and AUS/NZ geographies in 2oz/59mL, 4oz/100mL and 8oz/200mL flip-top bottles with induction seals. Gun Oil products have long been favorite lubricants of the fe- tish and kink communities, but Gun Oil Silicone couldn’t be used as a dressing aid because it contains Vitamin E which can de- grade the bindings on latex products. “We conducted extensive research in our labs on what enthusi- asts wanted and products they used as dressing aids, and created a three-molecule silicone blend that is superior to other products because of the ratios of the different-sized silicone molecules,” said Mark Olson, vice president of sales and marketing for Em- powered Products. “Fetish by Gun Oil is a full-bodied, ultra-slick formula that only needs to be applied once, and lasts all night without any gaps or stickiness.” “To be certain we had a winner, we conducted blind tests of our products against competing products with latex and fetish enthu- siasts, cam models, bloggers and fetish retailers nationwide,” said Olson. “The results were crystal clear—Fetish by Gun Oil was rated the best.” Fetish by Gun Oil comes in purple and black packaging that com- municates the purpose of the product. Its MSRP ranges from $12.95 to $31.95. Indiegogo Campaign Launched for SayberX LOS ANGELES— An Indiegogo campaign has been launched for Say- berX, a powered male masturbator that can be controlled remotely. Pre-orders for SayberX at special early bird pricing starting at $199 are now being accepted. SayberX has a soft, flesh-like inner chamber that is designed to sim- ulate the feeling of real sex. Users can also let someone else take over with the motion-tracking X-Ring to remotely control the movement and speed of the device. The SayberX masturbator can connect with the Bluetooth-enabled X-Ring that can also be wrapped around any existing sex toy to give it a motion-tracking upgrade when paired with a SayberX and ac- companying smartphone application, allowing users to connect with long-distance partners. "SayberX is built more like a supercar than a sex toy," said co-found- er Andy J. Smith. SayberX simulates the motion of a partner for solo pleasure and mirrors the actual movements of a partner for remote intimacy. Doc Johnson Goes Viral With BuzzFeed Video Doc Johnson was profiled on Buzzfeed with a behind-the-scenes video. NORTH HOLLYWOOD, CALIF. — A be- hind-the-scenes video showcasing Doc Johnson entitled, “How Sex Toys Are Made,” went viral last month. The BuzzFeed.com-produced vid- eo depicts the daily workings of Doc Johnson, and features various interviews with company team members, giving viewers a an inside look at what it takes to run the largest sex toy manufacturing compa- ny in America. The video has so far amassed more than 3 million views, with more than 19,000 comments and multiple thousands of “shares” on Buzz- Feed’s Facebook and YouTube pages. According to Doc Johnson COO Chad Braverman, the company has always been extremely committed to American manufacturing. “We think this BuzzFeed profile has done a fantastic job of show- ing our customers and fans all the work that goes into the products we make here,” Braverman says, noting that 75 percent of the firm’s goods are made in the U.S., calling it “a feat that becomes more challenging every year.” “The BuzzFeed video beautifully showcases the process behind the development of our products,” Braverman adds, “from the first set of hands in the factory, to the last set of hands, the consumers.” 114 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 115

116 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

AD INDEX ALTERNATIVE SITES, LTD 96 ANEROS 25 B-VIBE 98, 108 BABELAND 107 BACI 105 NATALIE FINEGOOD GOLDBERG, LMFT 53 NAUGHTY BUSINESS 103 NETBILING 78 OVO 39 BATHMATE 17 PERFECT FIT 113 BEDROOM K ANDI BOUTIQUE 26 PJUR USA 67, 78 PINK LIPSTICK LINGERIE 35 BLUE DREAMS GLOBAL INC. 104 PURE ROMANCE BY SHANNON 51 BODYWAND 7 PWD 66 CALEXOTICS 22 RED FORTERA 51 CAMPUS NEWS 111 REID MIHALKO 91 CANNASEXUAL 109 ROCK SOLID 73 CHAKRUBS 98 SATISFYER 18, 19, 20, CHAMIN AJJAN PSYCHOTHERAPY 53 SEX COACH U 104 21, 23, back cover CLASSIC EROTICA 15 SEX WITH DR. JESS 102 CU IN BED 91 SEX WITH EMILY 79, 134, 135 DAME PRODUCTS 106 SEXPERTISE 49 DOC JOHNSON 27, 29, 31, 33 SEXUAL HEALTH EXPO 118 DR. AVA CADELL'S LOVEOLOGY UNIVERSITY 117 SHE MAGAZINE 95 DR. TAMARA GRIFFIN 110 SKYN 102 DREAMGIRL 5 EDEN 97, 99 ENTRENUE 115 FREE SPEECH COALITION 94 GETTING IN THE MOOD 112 HIPLEASURES 112 HOLIDAY PRODUCTS 116 HOTFLOWERS 41 I KNOW MY STATUS 110 IMTOY 41 SHUNGA EROTIC ART 68, 69 SOLA 96 SPORTSHEETS 37 STUD100 81 SUBSENSUALS 82 SVAKOM 75 SYBIAN 82 SYSTEMJO 80 TANTRISS 92 TENGA 136 INDULGENCE BOUTIQUE 117 THE CENTER FOR SEXUAL PLEASURE & HEALTH 80 JELIQUE 14 THE PLEASURE CHEST 86, 87 JOPEN 11 THE RABBIT COMPANY 13 JOYBOXXX 30 TSX 30 K'HARA MCKINNEY, LMFT 108 UNBOUND 114 K AIT SCALISI 92 UVEE 49 K AMA SUTRA 9 VIBRATORS.COM 94 K AMA SUTRA 106 WE-VIBE 2, 3 L.A. CONFIDENTIAL 109 WET 77 LF DESIGNS 107 XGEN PRODUCTS 34 MELISSA FRITCHLE 47 XR LLC 45 NASSTOYS 47, 93 S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 117

118 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

event guide September 24-25, 2016 Brooklyn, NY S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 119

Welcome! to the 2016 Sexual Health Expo! T he Sexual Health Expo is back on the East Coast with a fresh slate of must-attend workshops and captivat- ing intimacy product showcases. Kicking off with a special ribbon cutting on Saturday, Sept. 24, SHE will open the doors to two full day of workshops, presented by Sex Ed Sponsor The Pleasure Chest. Sessions will cover ev- erything from anal sex basics to utilizing technology for sexual communication. Sessions include “Blow His Mind” with Dr. Jess, “Expert Guide to Female Pleasure” with Tristan Taormino, “Big, Fat, Hot Sex” with Laura Delarato and the “Down and Dirty With the Sexperts” panel facilitated by Tristan Taormino with Brandon B, Kenneth Play, Dirty Lola and Tina Horn, during which the experts with share their best sex tips, tricks and bedroom secrets to take erotic play to the next level. Guest speakers participating in SHE workshops include: Denise Pearson, Laura Delarato, Brandon B, Emily Morse, Tristan Taormino, Dr. Jess, Corynne, Sheri Winston, Tina Horn, Mollena Williams, and more. Throughout the day, SHE’s expansive exhibition hall will showcase the very best sex toys and accessories for wom- en, men and couples. The SHE exhibition hall will introduce attendees to a wide range of products ranging from cut- ting-edge vibrators to sexual enhancement products such as massage gels, candles and more. We hope that you enjoy yourselves at the 2016 SHE New York and that you make the most of everything the show has to offer — from the workshops to the exhibition area and mingling one-on-one with sexperts and fellow at- tendees. We look forward to celebrating sexual wellness with you in style! Sincerely, SHE Media Group 120 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

Expo Schedule Sexpert workshops sponsored by Saturday, September 24 Sexpert workshops 11:30 am - 12:10 pm Butt Sex Basics with Denise Pearson Sunday, September 25 Sexual Health Presentations Sexpert workshops 12:30 pm – 1:15 pm Make Life Sexier 11:30 am - 12:10 pm with Corynne 12:20 pm -1:00 PM JO Lubricants: Choose Your Own Sexual Adventure with Laura Delarato with Kira Manser MEd LCSW 1:10pm - 1:50pm The Secret Truth About Female Anatomy 1:30 pm – 2:15 pm with Sheri Winston Big, Fat, Hot Sex Better BJs with Brandon B. 2:00 pm - 3:00 pm Live Podcast Special with Emily Morse 3:10 pm - 4:20 pm Expert Guide to Female Pleasure with Tristan Taormino 4:30 pm - 5:30 pm Steamy sex for couples with Dr. Jess Tenga 3:30 pm - 4:15 pm Get Knotty with Babeland: Easy, Sexy Rope Play with Babeland Staff Educator 4:30 pm - 5:15 pm Sybian 12:20 pm -1:00 PM 1:10pm - 1:50pm Digital Dispatches: How to Sext, Skype & Swipe Your Way to Satisfaction with Tina Horn 2:00 pm - 3:00 pm Role-Playing: Using Your Head to Get Out of Your Body Sexual Health Presentations 12:30 pm - 1:15 pm Dame Products: Talk about Touching with Alexandra Fine 1:30 pm - 2:15 pm Get Knotty with Babeland: Easy, Sexy Rope Play with Babeland Staff Educator 2:30 pm - 3:15 pm Turn ME On with Satisfyer with Andrea Syrtash 3:30 pm - 4:15 pm LELO with Mollena Williams 3:10 pm - 4:20 pm Blow His Mind with Dr. Jess 4:30 pm - 6:00 pm Down and Dirty Panel facilitated by Tristan Taormino with Brandon B, Dirty Lola and Tina Horn S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 121

Sept 24 Details Workshops 3:10 pm - 4:20 pm Expert Guide to Female Pleasure with Tristan Taormino Do you want to have better, longer, easier, or more intense orgasms? From anatomy and arousal to external stimulation and penetration techniques, Tristan will show you the ins and outs of female pleasure and satisfaction. You’ll learn about: the phases of the female arousal cycle and how they vary; different types of orgasms; the best vibrators for pleasure and orgasm; clitoral stimulation techniques – oral and manual; G-spot toys and stimulation techniques; and how to have an orgasm during vaginal intercourse. 4:30 pm - 5:30 pm Steamy Sex for Couples sponsored by with Dr. Jess presented by 11:30 am -12:10 pm Have mind-blowing sex! Bring your partner to learn new techniques, hot spots and positions to ignite the fire in your relationship and keep it smokin’ hot. You’ll leave with a ton of new tricks and sexy homework assignments for a lifetime of steamy sex. Butt Sex Basics with Denise Pearson No taboo. Learn why a warm-up is important before anal exercise, why lube is your butt’s BFF, and how building comfort and trust with your partner can dispel common concerns such as pain or cleanliness. We’ll show you our favorite toys, how to use them solo or with a partner, cover the perks of having a prostate, anal G-Spot stimulation, and toy and partner safety. 12:20 pm -1:00 pm Sexual Health Presentations 12:30 pm – 1:15 pm Choose Your Own Sexual Adventure: How to Decide on the Right Lubricant with JO Lubricants with Kira Manser MEd LCSW, Executive Director - Center for Sexual Health and Pleasure Big, Fat, Hot Sex with Laura Delarato Despite common tropes about desexualized fat characters and how bigger people are portrayed in the media, people of size have sex too! Like, really really good sex. But it does come with its fair share of complications. In this workshop, we will go over consent, vocab, positions, products, and all the best ways to pleasure yourself and your partner(s) during your sexploration! Don’t consider yourself fat, big, curvy, chubby? No problem! Come learn how to please your plus size partner! You wouldn’t wear work boots to a black tie affair, so why wouldn’t you use the right lube for your sexual activity of choice? Let Kira Manser de-mystify the process of pairing lubricant to your intimate practices and preferences . 1:30 pm – 2:15 pm Tenga 3:30 pm - 4:15 pm 1:10 pm -1:50 pm Better BJs Get Knotty with Babeland: Easy, Sexy Rope Play with Brandon B with Babeland Staff Educator Want to give an even better blowjob? Discover how to use your whole body to go the distance. Find new ways to tailor your blowjob to your specific partner and toys that can amp up the experience. This class is for anyone who feels confident in giving head, but wants to take their skills to the next level. Get knotty with fun and sexy rope bondage! Babeland Sex Educators will show you the ropes with easy to learn techniques and a friendly approach. You and a partner will get the chance to try the moves during the workshop and will leave with plenty of inspiration for keeping things hot after the SHE Expo. 2:00 pm - 3:00 pm 4:30 pm - 5:15 pm Live Podcast Special with Emily Morse Sybian SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016 122

Sept 25 Details Workshops sponsored by 11:30 am - 12:10 pm Make Life Sexier with Corynne Learn some pleasure principles for making your sex life sizzle. Together we’ll explore the wide world of sex toys, and tips and tricks for solo play to expand your orgasmic potential. This presentation is a great fit for anyone looking to find, enhance or lengthen their orgasm. 12:20 pm - 1:00 pm The Secret Truth About Female Anatomy with Sheri Winston Did you know that women have as much erogenous erectile tissue as men do? Discover the whole Female Erectile Network (including the G-spot and so much more). It’s a mind-blowingly informative, radically empowering, fun, funny, comfortable presentation, illustrated by unique anatomy images, classic and humorous art! Find out what you’ve been missing! (For people of all genders.) 1:10 pm -1:50 pm Digital Dispatches: How to Sext, Skype and Swipe Your Way to Satisfaction with Tina Horn Join professional dirty talker, Tina Horn, the author of an upcoming book about Sexting, as she teaches you how to use your phone and computer to tease, seduce, and satisfy. How do you know what to sext? How do you know when it’s OK to send a nude picture? How do you look great when you’re putting on a Facetime masturbation show? How can you incorporate voyeurism, exhibitionism, domination, submission, and other kinks into your virtual lovelife? How do you keep your naughty pictures private, and how do you decide when to make them public? If you’ve taken any of Tina’s infamous Dirty Talk classes, consider this workshop the next stage of relationship communication for our modern world. 2:00 pm - 3:00 pm with Mollena Williams Although every child is an expert, as adults we frequently forget how to pretend, 3:10 pm - 4:20 pm Blow His Mind with Dr. Jess presented by Drive him wild with the hottest finger and tongue techniques from The New Sex Bible. In this session, we’ll talk dirty, explore erogenous zones and practice on tasty props all in the name of undeniably satisfying sex! 4:30 pm - 6:00 pm Down and Dirty with the Sexperts Panel Role-Playing: Using Your Head to Get Out of Your Body play ”make-believe“ and lose yourself in a story. Sure, you might have the hot fantasy of being an abducted princess or a captured spy, but how do you get past your day-to-day thought process and into to the spirit of this, one of the purest forms of play? How can you dissolve your ego into another character, and what do you do if you just wind up feeling pretty silly? In this class, we will discuss techniques for planning, negotiating and executing role-playing scenes, and how to boost your “other” energy. You’ll have a chance to play some games, to watch some play, and to let yourself go. with Brandon B, Dirty Lola and Tina Horn facilitated by Tristan Taormino This star-studded panel is the ultimate climax to your SHE experience! Local educators, writers and bloggers Tina Horn, Dirty Lola and Brandon B, led by Tristan Taormino, will share their best sex tips, tricks and bedroom secrets to take your play to the next level. There will also be time for Q&A to ask our experts personalized advice. Sexual Health Presentations 12:30 pm -1:15 pm Talk about Touching with Alexandra Fine, Co-Founder and CEO of Dame Products How to communicate with your partner about erogenous touching to get more from foreplay. 1:30 pm - 2:15 pm Get Knotty with Babeland: Easy, Sexy Rope Play with Babeland Staff Educator Get knotty with fun and sexy rope bondage! Babeland Sex Educators will show you the ropes with easy to learn techniques and a friendly approach. You and a partner will get the chance to try the moves during the workshop and will leave with plenty of inspiration for keeping things hot after the SHE Expo. 2:30 - 3:15 Turn ME On with Satisfyer with Andrea Syrtash, A relationship expert, on-air personality and author. Women are jugglers—balancing home, work, family responsibilities and more. Too often, they leave themselves out of the equation or feel a little too cut off from their own desires. In ‘Turn ME On’, relationship expert and author Andrea Syrtash shares 5 ways to re-spark a passionate and fulfilling life in and outside of the bedroom-brought to you by Satisfyer Pro 2. 3:30 - 4:15 Lelo S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 123

Speaker Bios Get to know the sexperts! Tristan Taormino Tristan Taormino is an award-winning writ- er, sex educator, speaker, and filmmaker. She is the author of eight books including the bestselling titles The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women, The Ultimate Guide to Kink, and The Secrets of Great G-Spot Orgasms and Female Ejaculation. She is the director, producer and host of two dozen sex education movies for Vivid-Ed, the instruc- tional line she created and helmed for Vivid Entertainment. She frequently lectures at top colleges and universities and teaches sex and relationship work- shops around the world. T WIT TER : @TristanTaormino FACEBOOK : face- book.com/AskTristan Dr. Jess Celebrity sexologist Dr. Jessica O’Reilly (aka Dr. Jess, PhD) is a best-selling author, speaker, and the host of PlayboyTV’s Swing. Her advice reaches millions across the globe and is featured weekly by top media outlets including Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, Men’s Fitness, Glamour, Entertain- ment Tonight, ABC Spark, Showtime, and Huffington Post. Corporate and entertain- ment clients alike flock to Dr. Jess’ events with sold-out audiences stretch- ing from Istanbul and Prague to Albuquerque and Cancun. Check out her TEDx talk online or visit her website at SexWithDrJess.com to learn more. T WIT- TER : @SexwithDrJess FACEBOOK : facebook.com/SexWithDrJess Mollena Williams This “Delicate, Trembling Flower of Submission” © is a NYC born and raised writer, actress, BDSM Educator, Storyteller, sobriety fiend since March 14th 2007, and an Award-Winning Executive Pervert. Owned and collared by renowned contemporary composer Georg Friedrich Haas since December 2013 and his wife since September 2015, she serves 124 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016 as his beloved slave, submissive, wife, servant and Muse. February 2016 saw a groundbreaking piece about their relationship featured in the New York Times. Her opinion and viewpoints on issues of kink, Leather and BDSM are frequently sought after by news and information sources such as The New York Times, The Huffington Post, Newsweek, Essence,andEbony, among other publications. She is a frequent guest expert on Dan Savage’s “Savage Lovecast,” has scored a triple header as the only threepeat feat. on Tristan Taormino’s “Sex Out Loud” radio show, and had been featured Margaret Cho’s “Monsters of Talk” podcast. Exploring kink since 1993, active in BDSM and the Leather Community since 1996, and presenting classes since 1998, she speaks at Leather, BDSM and Kink events across the US, Europe and Canada on many Leather and BDSM focused topics. She also brings the knowledge on Kink, BDSM and Leather to such august institutions of higher learning as SF State and Cal State, Harvard, Princeton,Yale, Stamford, University of Chicago, and Brown for IvyQ 2012. She has been invited to present at MIT, was a featured presenter at Yale for IvyQ 2013, and has been a guest speaker for at Smith College, Sarah Lawrence College, and Brown. In addition to being a featured lecturer at many kink and Leather events, she presented a well-received SRO plenary session for the American Association of Sexuality Educators Counselors & Therapists (AASECT) in June 2013. Sheri Winston Wholistic Sexuality teacher Sheri Win- ston CNM, RN, BSN, LMT is a groundbreak- ing, award-winning author, celebrated ‘sex- pert’ and educator. She offers empowering erotic education for everyone through her wide variety of transformational, inspira- tional and practical teachings. She’s the founder of the Intimate Arts Center, which offers pleasure-centered ‘sex-ed for grown- ups’. Sheri is the author of Women’s Anatomy of Arousal: Secret Maps to Bur- ied Pleasure (AASECT 2010 Book of the Year) and Succulent SexCraft: Your Hands-On Guide to Erotic Play and Practice. Her seventeen years as a sexuality teacher sit atop the foundation of her previous twenty-five years as a certi- fied nurse-midwife, gynecology practitioner, RN, doula, childbirth educator and massage therapist.

Tina Horn In 2010, she co-created, produced, and directed a video project called QueerPorn. Tv, which won two Feminist Porn Awards (Honored Website 2011 & Most Diverse Cast 2012) and a Cinekink Award (Best Experimental Short), in addition to being nominated for an AVN (Best Alternative Website). Over the past five years, Tina’s lectures on dirty talk, sex worker self care, and spanking have been featured at a variety of international venues, including The New School, Good Vibrations, Red Umbrella Diaries, Perverts Put Out, Lesbian Sex Mafia, Dark Odyssey, and the Feminist Porn Conference at University of Toronto. She has been a consultant on subjects of kink lifestyle, sex worker rights, and feminist pornography on HuffPost Live, The Washington Post, National Geographic, and at UC Berkeley and Evergreen College. Dirty Lola Lola is a naughty storyteller, sex encourager, sex toy peddler, and the creator and host of the live sex Q&A / go-go show and podcast Sex Ed A Go-Go. During the last six years, she has shared her distinctive brand of kickass body and sex-positivity and her personal journey into the kink and polyamorous lifestyles on and off stage. Lola has taken Sex Ed A Go-Go across the country to Los Angeles, CA, Piscataway, NJ, and Albuquerque, NM. She has also presented at Catalyst Con East and West, SHE NY, and during sex week at Baruch College and UNM. When she’s not traveling and spreading the sex positive gospel you can find her behind the counter at Shag Brooklyn where she runs the workshop program. Brandon B Brandon B. is a sex educator, writer, and performer living in Brooklyn, New York. Originally from Los Angeles, Brandon has performed and taught at various venues, colleges, and industry events across the nation for over a decade. As Manager of The Pleasure Chest’s West Village location, he eagerly seeks out new, creative, and fun ways to spread sex education to the masses while supporting local sex-positive artists & performers along the way. Corynne Peters Corynne Victoria Peters is a sex educator, actor and singer originally from Philadelphia. They graduated from NYU Tisch School of the Arts with degrees in Drama and Gender & Sexuality Studies. They live in Brooklyn with their fiancee and their cat. Denise Pearson Denise Pearson is an experienced sex educator & community organizer. She is supervisor of the pleasure Chest Upper Eastside and co-founder of one of the largest queer people of color kink groups in NYC. She is passionate about sex education and creating safe spaces for people to explore their sexuality. Laura Delarato Laura Delarato is a writer, producer, and video talent at Refinery29. She is a sex educator and has appeared in many R29 videos around consent, sex toys, and dirty talk. Laura is also essayist, photographer, and very fake Instagram model. S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 125

Our Vendors 126 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 127

EXHIBITOR MAP Exit Getting in the mood Cinekink Sexpertise Extended Fertility Tenga's Press Lounge Sex with Emily Im Toy The Pleasure Chest I Know My Status BathMate Venus Body Care Dame Products Sub Sensuals Indulgence Boutique Alternative Sites Blue Dreams Next Gen Health The Pleasure Chest Workshops Hi Pleasures Joyboxx System Jo 128 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

Restrooms Exit Exit The CSPH SHE Magazine Pjur USA Pure Romance Chamin Kama Sutra Vibrators .com Bodywand Tenga Bedroom Kandi OVO b-vibe Unbound CU in Bed Baci Sybian LifeStyles SKYN Uvee Hot Flowers Babeland Rabbit Co. We-Vibe Tantriss Sola Nitecap Megastore Caution Wear Entrance Doc Johnson Nasstoys Chakrubs Entrance Satisfyer SHE Exhibitor Presentations S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 129

Things to do in Brooklyn Brooklyn Bridge City Hall Park, Brooklyn, NY Brooklyn Heights Promenade Remsen Street to Orange Street along the East River, Brooklyn, NY Brooklyn Botanic Garden Dumbo Williamsburg 990 Washington Ave, Brooklyn, NY Prospect Park 450 Flatbush Ave, Brooklyn, NY Brooklyn Museum 200 Eastern Pkwy, Brooklyn, NY Brooklyn Heights Pierrepont St & Henry Street, Brooklyn, NY Brooklyn Brewery 79 N 11th St, Brooklyn, NY Plus make sure to visit your local Adult Retailers The Pleasure Chest Babeland 1150 2nd Ave New York, NY 10065 130 SHE MAGAZINE // 462 Bergen St Brooklyn, NY 11217 S E PTE MB E R 2016

Thank Sponsors You to our REGISTRATION SPONSOR PRESS LOUNGE SPONSOR SEX-ED SPONSOR VIP ROSÉ PRESS RECEPTION SPONSOR DIAMOND SPONSORS OFFICIAL WINE & SPIRITS PARTNER OFFICIAL HYDRATION PARTNER S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 131

Notes // 09.24.2016 132 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

Notes // 09.25.2015 S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 133

134 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016

S EP TEMB ER 2 0 16 // SHE MAGAZINE 135

136 SHE MAGAZINE // S E PTE MB E R 2016